'Mommy Dead and Dearest' Looks at the Truth Behind a Mother’s Gruesome Murder
Gypsy Blanchard image courtesy HBO

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'Mommy Dead and Dearest' Looks at the Truth Behind a Mother’s Gruesome Murder

Dee Dee and Gypsy Blanchard seemed like the perfect mother and daughter, until Gypsy became the lead suspect in her mother’s murder.

The chilling message that went out on Facebook that June night in Missouri in 2015 read simply, "That bitch is dead."

It was posted on an account shared by mother and daughter Dee Dee and Gypsy Blanchard. Dee Dee was the ever-doting mom looking after her only child Gypsy, who Dee Dee claimed suffered from multiple illnesses including muscular dystrophy, epilepsy, chromosomal defects and childhood leukemia. She was in a wheelchair and took most of her food through a feeding tube. Nonetheless, Gypsy was an effervescent child and the pair were well-liked and well taken care of wherever they went. Their close relationship made the bizarre Facebook post all the more horrifying.

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When police eventually went inside Dee Dee's house a few days later, what they found was even more shocking. The 48-year-old had been stabbed multiple times and young Gypsy was nowhere to be found.

The truth about what happened to Dee Dee began to unravel and soon Gypsy was not a kidnap victim but a suspect on the run. A heartbreaking story of deceit, abuse and years of manipulation began to emerge. Not only was Gypsy Blanchard not sick, but she could walk. Her mother had spent over a decade lying to health professionals, family, friends and Gypsy herself. She'd even lied about her age.

In the new HBO documentary, Mommy Dead and Dearest, that premiered on Monday, filmmaker Erin Lee Carr delves into the lives of Dee Dee and Gypsy, getting intimate interviews with family and friends and painting a chilling portrait of a mother determined to control everyone and everything around her. "Nobody knew the true Dee Dee. I think she was a different person whoever she interacted with. With her kid, with Gypsy, she was all powerful. She was nurturing. She was smothering. She could be a lover and abuser within the same day," Carr told VICE.

But far from a grim true crime exploitation, Carr's film captures Gypsy's transformation from captivity to personhood and the evolving relationship between Gypsy and her father and stepmother, Rod and Kristy Blanchard. It is in that relationship that the heart of Mommy Dead and Dearest is most effective and evocative. "[Watching them together] it's about forgiveness. I learn everyday interacting with them, how to be thoughtful, how to be kind, how to be there for someone," Carr told VICE.

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I spoke with Rod and Kristy about the film, getting to know the real Gypsy and what it's like to plan a future with your child from jail.

VICE: Take me back to the moment that you first learned about Dee Dee's death.
Rod Blanchard: I was at work, [and] received a phone call from Dee Dee's sister. Information was kind of, you know, just, hearsay, I think the initial story was that Dee Dee was dead and Gypsy was missing, which, I guess, was fairly accurate at the time. The police were still investigating and tracking down Gypsy. So it was pretty scary. I was confused. I don't know, I couldn't understand why someone would murder a mother and kidnap a child. So, it was blurry from the beginning, you know?

What about when you found out that Gypsy was involved? How did that feel?
That felt pretty strange to think that she was involved with anything, and when we found out that she was involved, at that same time we found out she can walk. So it was a scatterbrain of information we received at that time. So there was shock. I was happy that she was walking. I was confused about what Dee Dee had been telling me all of these years. So there was a lot of mixed emotions about the case and about what we were finding out at that time, initially, and then, you know, the pieces of the puzzle began falling into place, I guess you can say, as we learned more and more. Initially, very shocked.

I can't even imagine dealing with the shock of this horrific crime, but then finding out that your daughter can walk and that's she's been through all this stuff. Looking back, do you ever ask, you know, why she didn't reach out to you earlier to let you know what was happening?
Yes, I mean we've asked her that. I've asked her and [I] understand why she didn't. So the need to ask her that question was almost pointless. It was about Dee manipulating Gypsy and controlling the information that she got about me every phone call, every communication between Gypsy and I was filtered through Dee Dee. So what she thought about me and knew about me was all filtered through Dee Dee. She may not have had a full understanding of how I could help her. That I would really be there for her. Dee Dee just controlled that information, so she had Gypsy believing that was not an avenue to pursue.

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Screencap courtesy HBO

What was it like to see the documentary for the first time and kind of have the whole story really fleshed out for you?
It was really nice to see what a good job Erin did putting all of this together. The timeline and the information she got, the interview, the backstory, the old videos and everything like that. It was nice to see how everything came together. It was very emotional watching it still, I mean, we've seen it four or five times and I still get really emotional about it.

What is it that makes you feel emotional?
Just to see Gypsy's transformation from the beginning to the end of the film. How she changed. It's very emotional just to see her hugging me and just wanting to come home with us. I mean that's hard to see, you know? And just other emotions, frustration and anger at Dee Dee for what she put Gypsy through. I mean there was a lot of stuff that we didn't know until we saw the documentary, you know?

Has Gypsy seen the film?
Kristy Blanchard: No, they don't allow her to, which I think is best. When she does, when she's ever ready to see it, we'll be with her watching it, because it's going to be emotional. She knows that there's pictures of the crime scene and everything, and I don't know if she'll be able to handle that.

Does she have a sense of the global reach of the her story?
Kristy: Yes, she sure does. I have a support group that I made and there's people from Australia, there's people from—I mean it's everywhere, from Ukraine. So when I'm on the phone with her, I'll put her on speaker and I'll read her some things of things that people write. That helps her a lot knowing that she has this support.

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How has your relationship with Gypsy changed since all of this has happened?
Rod: It's completely changed. I think now she feels like she can call me anytime she needs anything. I mean there's not a whole lot she can expect or ask for a while she's, you know, in prison but I have the sense that she will call when she needs something now and that was completely nonexistent prior to this. So it's a start.

Why did you both want to participate in the documentary?
Rod: We thought it was important to get Gypsy's true story out. We wanted to be completely honest with it.

Kristy, how did it feel as a mother, watching some of that stuff? It must have been hard.
Kristy: It was very hard. I just couldn't wrap my head around some of the things because, as a mother, you know, you carry this child for nine months and you want to protect them, from the womb, you want to protect them. No matter what, you know, you want to see your kids blossom and fall in love and have their first heartbreak, first prom, everything, you know? And she denied Gypsy of all of that.

Do you guys talk about the future when you visit?
Rod: Yes, absolutely. Sure, she wants to live a normal life for one. She talks about doing some culinary thing, maybe being a beautician, coming back home down South Louisiana with us and starting her life, wherever that may lead.

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