A British Aristocrat Is Facing a Life Sentence for Drug Smuggling

Jack Marrian, the grandson of the Sixth Earl Cawdor of Castlemartin, who owns a big fuck-off castle in Scotland, is facing a life sentence in a Kenyan prison. The 31-year-old, who is a big cheese in the Kenyan sugar business, is accused of attempting to smuggle £4.5 million worth of cocaine from South America to Africa in freight ships.

He's the managing director of Mshale Commodities in Uganda, which is where the drugs were destined. Mshale Commodities released a statement about the naughty little aristocrat, saying, "We can confirm that Mshale's managing director, Jack Marrian, is assisting the Kenyan authorities to provide them with whatever information they require. Mshale operates stringent procedures to protect the integrity of its supply chain. Until these investigations are concluded, we are unable to comment further."

To give you a sense of scale as to how posh this man is, Marrian's birth was announced in the "Baby, It's You" newborn page in the March 1986 edition of Tatler, along with Otis Ferry, Fifi Geldof and Chloe Delevingne. His family estate is called "Cawdor Castle", which is near Inverness, and comes complete with a golf course and a whole assortment of other shit. Along with being the managing director of Mshale Commodities, he is also a director for Kilombero Sugar Company. His whole family live in Kenya, including his two brothers Hunter and Finlay, who may or may not be the CEOs of their own colonialist oil barrel production companies – just making wild assumptions here.

Marrian spent a few nights in custody in a Nairobi jail before being released. He was, however, rearrested and plonked in front of a judge in Kibera court in the Kenyan capital. Prosecutors opposed bail as Marrian supposedly posed a "flight risk", and want to keep him under lock and key until Monday, when the case will resume.

I think I speak for all of us when I say I hope this plucky young sugar and commodities director beats the accusation of mass cocaine smuggling and everyone just leaves him alone. He must have had a very rough time of it so far, and I think it's important that we all, in whichever way we can, show our support for this banged up Brit abroad. Good luck, mate!

@joe_bish

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