Scottish Supermarket Fires Robot Employee for Scaring Away Customers

You can have sex with them, watch them strip dance, or fear for the future of humanity as they backflip over obstacles like a primed human-killing machine. Robots are one of the 21st century’s biggest technological developments, and it’s only a matter of time before they fuck us all over. Stephen Hawking literally said that they could lead to the end of mankind. Stephen Hawking.

Luckily, one robot is at no risk of methodically crushing our bodies using its mechanised robot legs. Fabio, a robot developed by Heriot-Watt University in Scotland, was hired and very quickly fired by a supermarket for being totally useless.

As reported by website IFLScience, the robot was introduced to Margiotta's, an independent supermarket in Edinburgh, as part of the new BBC documentary series, Six Robots & Us. Fabio, a small humanoid creation designed by Japanese company SoftBank Robotics, was placed in the supermarket to help customers with their shopping, and give directions and hugs (if needed).

Dealing with an inventory of over 100 products, the robot took voice commands from customers, moved around the store, and offered samples. However, he wasn’t quite as helpful as store owners had originally intended. In fact, Fabio was a bit of a dick.

If asked to locate the milk, Fabio would reply, “you can find it in the fridges.” When a customer wanted to know where the beer was, Fabio helpfully informed them, “you can find it in the alcohol section.” Cheers, Fabio.

What’s more, Fabio’s suspiciously sweet face and digitally coded desire to give hugs in inappropriate social situations understandably freaked some customers out. On a Tuesday night shop for garlic bread and cigarettes, do you really need a small, anthropomorphic robot silently appearing behind you and initiating physical contact?

As a result of this terrible performance, Margiotta’s decided to relieve Fabio from his trial employment run.

It’s a tough market out there.