Bitch, she's Madonna. But in case you all needed to be reminded that the queen of pop is still as cool as she wants you to think she is, the iconic performer threw herself a Madonna-themed party in the video for "Bitch, I'm Madonna" because that's not desperate at all, right? I mean, look at all the relevant pop-stars and rappers in this video! The proof is in the self-promoting pudding. It's so cute when little girls call themselves bad bitches, right? Pink tips are still cool, right?
Why is she trying this hard? Can't she just listen to herself and realise, bitch, you're MADONNA? You don't need to jump on this ridiculous #squadgoals band-wagon and define yourself by the company you keep and you certainly don't need Chris Rock to tell you you're Mandonna. And on that note, what in the world is Steve Aoki doing in this video? Please, Madonna. Just chill for a second on this relentless re-branding because the truth is we never left you.