Jerking Off


​What Kind of Porn Gets You Off the Fastest?

Redheads, we think.


I Was a Teenage Fruit Fucker

For years, I improvised physical intimacy with inanimate DIY objects, trying everything from microwaved melons to surgical gloves wrapped in a towel.


Rain City Jacks Is Seattle's Premier Masturbation Club

It's like Fight Club but instead of punching, men are touching each others' peens. (And you can talk about it.)


Is It Really Possible to Ruin Your Penis From Jerking Off Too Hard?

There's this idea floating around the internet that if you're having a hard time ejaculating during sex, you might have something called "Death Grip Syndrome."


The Dangers of Masturbation

In extreme cases, self-pleasuring can actually fracture your dick and rupture your arteries. Be careful out there.


South Dakota's 'Don’t Jerk And Drive' Campaign Was Pulled Because No One Was Mature Enough to Handle It

The PSA was supposed to grab the attention of drivers, but it sounded like it was talking about grabbing something else.


The Perils of Jerking Off in the Dial-Up Era

Just hearing the dial-Up tone used to give me an erection.


Owning Porno Used to Mean Something, Damnit

The internet really changed the way people masturbate.


How to Jerk Off at Work

This isn't one of your hour-long stroke sessions in your bathrobe.


I Don’t Know Who My Father Is, but I Have Dry Earwax

Through the magic of earwax, I finally have a clue as to who my real dad is.


The World's Greatest Job

I thought jizz moppers didn't exist anymore. Isn't it illegal to beat off in public places now?