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Granted, this hasn't made a huge splash in the UK quite yet – or, really, anywhere outside of a few select states in Australia. But it is occasionally shown in pubs over here, meaning there has to be some kind of audience for it.
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Draped in AFL or National Rugby League garb, his voice is seven to eight octaves lower than seems physically possible. He speaks like a Gatling gun, bookending everything he says with "eh". He'll sidle up to you in bars and tell you to "have a cup of concrete and harden the fuck up", completely unprovoked, just because he likes how the idiom makes him sound.As irritating as that seems, these guys are generally a lot of fun to be around. They're great to "punch frothies" with, have a ton of energy for trying irresponsible things and are really helpful on camping trips (they'll watch you struggle for five seconds, take over, set up your tent for you and stress how incompetent you are for the entire duration).WE SHOW YOU HOW TO LIVE WELL
Melbourne has been voted the most liveable city in the world for four years in a row. The jewel in the brown land's crown is the envy of its sister states and the world at large, and also the benchmark we can use to explain to you how you should be living your lives better.
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Invented by an Australian in 1926, these are great at keeping British people alive for far longer than their black-pudding scorched and cocaine-swamped hearts had intended.WI-FI
Developed by an Australian, this is great for watching Vine compilations on the toilet and provoking long, enraged telephone conversations with your network provider about why your service keeps cutting out.
Bands like Tame Impala, Rat & Co, Chela, Eddie Current Suppression Ring, Violent Soho, British India and the Drunk Mums. Fashion labels like Discount Universe, Black Milk and Cameo. Finally some exports we can be proud of after decades of awkwardness among my homeland's culturally astute about all the shit we were tossing your way.OLD WAVE AUSTRALIANA
Kylie, Neighbours, Barry Humphries, Home and Away, Steve Irwin, Heath Ledger – everything that contributed to your childhood in vital yet mostly intangible ways.(Sorry about Mel Gibson and Rolf Harris – probably could have done without either of them, eh?)
Australians in the UK seem to be very good at moving stuff. If you need to lift something and put it somewhere else, but don't feel up to it, chances are you'll call someone with a van, and that someone is often Australian.
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Pizza, we officially do better than anyone else in the world, and coffee – well, as Australians, we're at a loss at your nation's inability to pour hot water over coffee grains and add milk without it tasting like wheelie bin water. So we open shops and do it for you.Yes, we didn't come up with either of these, but that doesn't matter. In the southern hemisphere, we're less about inventing stuff, more about taking pre-existing stuff and doing it way better than you (shouts to the Australian national cricket team).To be honest, moving away from Europe and the declining US – and instead aligning ourselves with the Asia-Pacific region – is something we increasingly talk about when you're not in the room. But still, we want the visas and we've got a long history with you guys, so we just aren't jerks about it.Go, Britannia, you're still winning the race!More from VICE:The Ballad of Emile HeskeyThings You Learn When You Become a Dad for the First TimeThe Adventures of Scallywag and His Dickhead Mates