As copy editor of VICE.com, it's my job to read every word that appears on our site and make sure everything is in its right place—that all the commas and semicolons are where they need to be, names and places are spelled correctly, and "fuccboi" is written in the proper style. Over the course of the day, some sentences from our stories catch my eye, usually because they're good or funny or odd or compelling in some way. Here they are now, presented with zero context, for the week of September 18. To find out why they exist or how they were used, simply click the link for the full story.
- Cue the tears.
- Her bed is from IKEA, but she still uses it to tie people up just fine.
- I don't want to kill you today.
- I prefer to err on the side of modernity when it comes to dentistry.
- But the town soon found that she had much more nefarious, turd-related intentions.
- Witches are cool now.
- I was kind of a bit of a racist.
- I was never really quite comfortable around my grandpa after that.
- I want Pennywise to sneak into my bedroom at night, hold me down by my throat, and fuck me while staring down at me with those crazy yellow eyes.
- First, they were obsessed with Pokémon, then ninjas, then rap stars, before finally fixating on ISIS.
- I wanted to take him out back and do dirty, sexy things to him.
Follow Alex Norcia on Twitter.