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Presenting: Relevant Bands Kasabian and Stereophonics' Top Tips for Staying Relevant in 2017

Or, why guitar music in the UK is struggling.
Lauren O'Neill
London, GB

Get excited, Real Music Fans, because Purveyors of Real Music Kasabian and Stereophonics are feeling good about 2017. They'll both be releasing new albums in the coming months, and they've also been sharing their wisdom on their continued success, with interviews in NME and Q. Kasabian have even claimed that their new LP will save guitar music from "the abyss" (because the shifts in taste have nothing to do with other genres exploring interesting territory too, or the monopoly on perspectives in the music press only coming from outlets that cover guitar music). Here's how these two extremely with-it music groups advise that you keep on top in 2017:

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1) Definitely use your own experience as a wealthy male as a microcosm for the rest of the world. 
NME reports that Kasabian's new album was "written as a 'feel-good' record as an antidote to the rest of the world's troubles and the demons facing frontman Tom Meighan." I am sure Tom Meighan has certainly faced some hardship in his life, as have we all, but I'm not sure a hastily written, stadium indie track with two lines of lyrics has the complete power to heal the world, unfortunately.

2) Say "diverse" a bit.
Kelly Jones out of the Stereophonics reckons that their shows are "diverse" because "there's like 16 and 17-year-old kids in the front row which is really good for us." Um? To be honest if anyone was going to miss the diversity in ethnicity, gender and sexual orientation memo it was always probably going to be your man out of the Stereophonics wasn't it? (Also just FYI those kids have absolutely been dragged along by their dads.)

3) Connect with your fans.
Apparently the guy out of Kasabian is really good at making fans feel like they're not alone, because he too has had a breakup. "Tom's heart is on his sleeve and he can get hurt, because he's so open. That's why people relate to him," Kasabian guitarist Serge Pizzorno told Q." He can stand in front of a hundred thousand people and they come away feeling not so alone, they've connected with this man who can show them their pain and their euphoria. It's powerful, do you know what I mean? We're real. Especially Tom. He's the realest fucking man there is." Because the deepest emotions that exist are communicated via songs that sound like they were written to soundtrack goal sequences on Match of the Day. This is how I #connect.

4) Absolutely keep going for 20 whole years because, to be fair, people are still going to your shows.
The Stereophonics are in their 20th year and in 2016 had "a great summer playing in stadiums, castles and arenas." I don't know who is buying all these CDs and tickets, but what I do know is that this band had better thank their lucky stars for the concept of middle age and the nostalgia fire that burns in the hearts of people who were just crossing from teendom to adulthood in the late 90s.

Thanks lads!

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(Image by Chris Worden via Wikimedia Commons)