Update 3:40 p.m. ET: The Australian man had to tag out. He'll be back.
It took 448 pages for special counsel Robert Mueller to explain his investigation into whether Donald Trump’s campaign colluded with Russia to influence the 2016 elections or whether Trump tried to mess with that probe.
If you’re wondering how long it’ll take an Australian man to read all those pages — and also get very thirsty doing it — we’ve got you covered.
Attorney General William Barr released Mueller’s report Thursday morning after spending several weeks, with a team at the Department of Justice, redacting anything in the text that could damage an ongoing investigation, reveal classified intel, or violate anyone’s privacy unnecessarily.
Even so, the results of the two-year investigation rang in at two volumes.
In them, Mueller explains his team’s investigative process, how the Russian Internet Research Agency sent a guy dressed as Santa Claus wearing a Trump mask “walking around New York City,” and how Trump said he was “fucked" after Mueller was appointed.