Illmatic is like a Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup™ because there is no wrong way to listen to it. But there are definitely preferred environments for appreciating Nas’s two-decade old, objectively perfect debut LP. “Represent” and “One Love” and “NY State Of Mind” and “Halftime” will always sound great through Rite Aid-purchased headphones on a subway through Queens, or in a Japanese luxury sedan (from the 00’s—let’s not get too jiggy) with a blunt in traffic on Northern Blvd. (Conversely, no matter how much money you throw at dude, Nas will never sound good at a tech conference.)But a couple years ago, I cracked the code. I lived out the scientifically ideal situation for listening to Illmatic. Let me break it down for you.1) Go to high school in the mid-to-late-90’s. You will go through a lot of things that seem important at the time but aren’t really and Nas will inevitably be the soundtrack for a lot of them. Also you will smoke a lot of drugs.2) Become a rap nerd. Learn a lot about rap. This will give you a lot of extra shit to say about Illmatic as every drop of history gets squeezed out of the album’s prestige.3) End up at your place at like 3 AM on a Friday night drunk with a friend from high school who is crashing on your couch and a chick who just moved to New York you have a “maybe she won’t but then again maybe she will” vibe with.4) Get thoroughly stoned and talk about rap music. Make sure said girl is young enough that she’s heard Illmatic but never *really* listened to it because she wasn’t there, right?5) Ask said girl if she’s ever *really* listened to Illmatic. Regardless of girl’s response, put on Illmatic.6) Start out strong by pointing out how Nas saying “I don’t even know how to start this shit” at the beginning of “NY State of Mind”, then allegedly banging out the entire song in one take is one of the greatest moments in the history of rap. (Forget where you read/heard that but continue to believe it because it makes a dope story.)7) This is VERY important: be drunk enough to spit the entirety of AZ’s verse on “Life’s A Bitch”. Fuck up “as long as we be thievin we be leavin with some kind of dough, so…” but whatever. (Is homegirl lookin kinda bored? It’s working!)8) Allow the conversation to quickly devolve into you and your dude from high school reminiscing about high school. Be very specific about late night diners and entirely unmemorable house parties and the amount of time you spent practicing juggling “Halftime”.9) Do not get laid.You have now mastered Illmatic. Word up, son.Skinny walks through the valley of the shadow of getting laid on Twitter—@Skinny412
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