100 Days Until College Football, 10 Things To Look Forward To

100 days.

100 days until tailgating, body painting, all-day binge drinking, excessive screaming, overreacting, trash talking, and, of course, college football consuming the next three to five months of our fanatical lives. For the students, alumni, and fans that call stadiums home and thousands of spectators family, today is a day of anticipation as much as it is of celebration. With the freshman recruiting class packing their bags and heading to campus, training camp itineraries fresh off the press, and depth charts wiped clean, there is so much uncertainty to look forward to.

There are things, however, that we can guarantee, and maybe even dread as the 2015-16 season approaches.

1. The Snoop Dog Game Day Cameo

In 100 days—and for the next three to five years—you will not be able to watch a televised broadcast of a UCLA Bruins game without some Snoop Doggy-Dog action. He will be there, coaching his son Cordell from the luxury box suites in Rose Bowl stadium, convincing his wife that he deserves Jim Mora's job.

2. SEC Will Seek Redemption

The SEC didn't dominate last season and people are still pondering if that means college football is dying. Is the Big Ten the new SEC? Will the SEC ever recover from this tragedy? How do you even spell the word "failure"? Stop being a sore loser and just accept the joyous fact that 'SEC speed' is a busted myth and not the unattainable magic trick that makes a championship trophy appear.

3. Jim Harbaugh Screaming And Doing Something Weird

Not only is this a guarantee, this is common sense. Screaming and weirding people out with his words and blank stares is what Jim Harbaugh does. Yea, it's his first year coaching at his alma mater, high profile players are leaving the program, the Big Ten is thriving, but the mysterious case of Jim Harbaugh and his khaki pleated pants will be there, from kickoff until eternity.

4. University of Alabama-Birmingham Will Not Win Any Games

Are you a die-hard UAB football fan? Sorry, but you're going to have to wait more than 100 days to see the Blazers kickoff because the Blazers no longer exist. Even though VICE Sports did the math and provided ample evidence that UAB did not need to cut their football program, Conference USA will be one team short heading into the 2015 season. This is just as stupid as it is sad. #FreeUAB

5. Ezekiel Elliot Will Be Fully Clothed

When you think of college football, you think of Ohio State. When you think of Ohio State, you think of Ezekiel Elliot. When you think of Ezekiel Elliot, you think of crop tops. When Ezekiel Elliot thinks of crop tops, he will be sad. In case you forgot about the tragic rule bestowed upon the land of college football at the end of last season, altering a game day jersey to expose a player's bare midriff—or wearing a sporty crop top—is considered an "illegal equipment issue" and will result in the player being removed from the field of play until the 'issue' is resolved. R.I.P. to the crop top, you will be missed, maybe.

While we're on the subject of crop tops…

6. Shawn Oakman Will Give You Nightmares

As he should. The defensive end out of Baylor terrified millions with his massive size and video game-like muscle definition and became the first viral meme of 2015.

NCAA- We're banning crop top jerseysShawn Oakman- No you're notNCAA- Everyone now has to wear a crop top jersey pic.twitter.com/ZRY63WYfDj
— John Norton (@DatJohnnyBoy626) March 10, 2015

But what most people don't know is that this same monster of a human that inspired a social media phenomena with his "I can beat the shit out of you" physique ended up at Baylor for doing something along those lines. Oakman started out his college career as a Nittany Lion, but was kicked off the team by then head coach Bill O'Brien after pushing a female cashier into a wall after she caught him trying to steal a hoagie and grape juice from a campus convenience store. He was cited for disorderly conduct, harassment, and retail theft.

Oh, and speaking of Penn State….

7.Sandusky Jokes

Even though 'Ped State' jokes were soooo four years ago, asshole fans will continue to make not-so-original and grossly inappropriate pedophilia jokes towards Penn State fans and athletes who had absolutely nothing to do with the Jerry Sandusky scandal. He's in prison for life, it's time to let your offensive jokes rot with him.

8. Football Players Will Make Millions of Dollars For Their School

And not see a dime of it.

9. Ohio State Will Have A Quarterback

Whether it is Braxton Miller, Cardale Jones, J.T. Barrett, or even LeBron James—you never know—someone will be handing off the ball to Ezekiel Elliot in 100 days. I promise.

10. Extremely Raw Emotions

We will laugh. We will cheer. We will sulk. We will definitely cry. That's what makes college football so great.

100 more days, and all this will be yours.