Dear Costco Wholesaler, Make Me a Christmas Light Suit

The following correspondence is from a manuscript of emails titled "Letters of Interest," by Fred Sasaki. Subjects arise from spam and angst, anger and absurdity, frustration and fuckall—Eros and Thanatos from inbox to inbox. Enter to witness non-consensual collaborative narrative.

[Personal information has been changed, but the rest of the emails have been left unedited in the interest of full disclosure and larfs—Ed.]

Costco Wholesales China Manufacturer

35 messages

From: Adam Liu
To: Fred Sasaki
Date: Sat, Nov 27, 2010 at 12:44 AM
Subject: * Costco Wholesales China Manufacturer / Christmas led light,tree,LED tube,bulb,lamp

Hello Friend,

Good day!

Crosspint Company here, professional manufacturer for led tube, led bulb, christmas led light, christmast tree with good quality and competive price.

Please kindly response, let us discuss details.

Attached please kindly find our profile.

*** Main customers we serving are Costco Wholesales, Wal-mart Wholesales, GKI, Seasons 4 etc.
***UL, CSA, CSA-UL, CE, SAA, CQC, BS, GS, RoHS certified
***Voltage: 12V, 24V, 120V, 240V
***Lamp cap for Christmas led light available:3mm, 5mm, M5 mini, G12,G20,G25, G50, C3, C4, C5, C6, C7, C9, 3"/5"/7"/9" Icicle etc.
***Product Line: Screw led lamp(C7/C9 3 LEDs), Light string, Net light, Curtain light (icicle light set), Battery Operated light, Solar led light
LED Bulb, LED tube, LED street lamp, Commercial coaxial led light, Christmas tree etc.

===========================================

Crosspoint Industry Company Limited
Add: xxx.xxx
xxxxx, xxx
Tel: xxxx-xxx xxxx xxxx Fax:xxxx-xxx- xxxx xxxx
Email: xxx.xxx@gmail.com
Company Profile-Holiday led light.pdf
576K

________________________

From: Fred Sasaki
To: Adam Liu
Date: Sat, Nov 27, 2010 at 9:32 PM
Subject: Re: * Costco Wholesales China Manufacturer / Christmas led light,tree,LED tube,bulb,lamp

Hello and good day!

I am interested in injection lighting. Can you help me?

Thanks,

Fred Sasaki

________________________

From: Adam Liu
To: Fred Sasaki
Date: Sun, Nov 28, 2010 at 8:54 AM

Dear fred,

Nice to hear from you.

What kind of led light do you need?

Please advice:

1,voltage: 24V,120V, or 240V?

2,how many counts on one led light do you require ?

3,bulb cap: C6,C9,or 5mm without cap etc ?

Please more details on led light you need.

Best regards,

Adam Liu

________________________

From: Fred Sasaki :
To: Adam Liu
Date: Date: Wed, Dec 1, 2010 at 1:00 AM
Subject: Re: * Costco Wholesales China Manufacturer / Christmas led light,tree,LED tube,bulb,lamp

Hi Adam,

Well I need some expertise deciding what kind of led light I need and how many volts and how many counts on one led light I require. The size part especially. Basically I would like to create an outfit of lights that I can wear around and glow in the dark with. I plan on wearing this without clothes so I don't think fire will be an issue unless I'm sitting or laying down, but there is the burning aspect. Thus I thought the tubing would be very helpful. I want to glow all over.

I'm thinking kind of like Tron or the Arcade Fire. I've attached a couple pictures for your reference. I suppose since I won't be wearing clothes the Tron version is better, but you are the expert.

Thanks so much and let me know.

Fred

2 attachments

________________________

From: Fred Sasaki
To: Adam Liu
Date: Fri, Dec 3, 2010 at 11:09 AM
Subject: Re: * Costco Wholesales China Manufacturer / Christmas ledlight,tree,LED tube,bulb,lamp

Hey Adam,

Any progress on the lights? Let's wrap this up as I want to have the suit in time for Christmas.

Thanks,

Fred

________________________

From: Adam Liu
To: Fred Sasaki
Date: Fri, Dec 3, 2010 at 5:43 PM
Subject: Re: * Costco Wholesales China Manufacturer / Christmas ledlight,tree,LED tube,bulb,lamp

Hey Fred,

Sorry for my late reply!

It is not our expertise on this, we can not help you with the tubing clothing.

Any other needs, please let me know freely.

Thanks and best regards,

Adam Liu

________________________

From: Fred Sasaki
To: Adam Liu
Date: Fri, Dec 3, 2010 at 6:45 PM
Subject: Re: * Costco Wholesales China Manufacturer / Christmas ledlight,tree,LED tube,bulb,lamp

Hi Adam,

I accept your apology. I was wondering.

But let me say no no no. I am not asking you for your expertise on tubing clothing, but your expertise on led lights and bulbs and size and wattage. Particularly injection lighting inside my body so that I may glow in the dark. Did you see The Last Dragon? Probably not so you don't know what I mean. So let me be clear (did you even look at the pictures I sent?!) that I need light bulbs and injections for a glow-suit or to find a way to mount light bulbs inside and on me to make me glow, like the Last Dragon. I don't need to be able to jump around and make kicks but that would be great. I do need to be able to bend over.

So maybe a good way for you to understand, Adam, is to think of me as a Christmas tree. Basically I need you to wrap me up in lights all over my body and make me a symbol of holy matrimony and God and redemption and kindness and giving and big package gifts if you know what I mean. Please tell me this finally makes sense.

Will you take my credit card over the e-mail?

Thanks,

Fred

________________________

From: Adam Liu
To: Fred Sasaki
Date: Fri, Dec 3, 2010 at 6:54 PM
Subject: Re: * Costco Wholesales China Manufacturer / Christmas ledlight,tree,LED tube,bulb,lamp

Hi Fred,

Basically I can understand what you said.

But we can not make per the pictures you sent.

Please add me on skype: adamliu5217

We can discuss more.

Best regards,

Adam Liu

________________________

From: Fred Sasaki
Date: Sun, Dec 5, 2010 at 12:51 PM
To: Adam Liu
Subject: Re: * Costco Wholesales China Manufacturer / Christmas ledlight,tree,LED tube,bulb,lamp

Adam,

I'm getting pretty pissed off. I was at an awesome bar in Chicago Lincoln Park called Irish Oak and not only was there an E! Entertainment special on Tron playing all around me on the TV, but the douche bags were dressed up in sweaters with flashing lights in them and/or had Christmas lights, lit up and/or blinking, wrapped around themselves. They were able to drink and dance like that. Imagine how I felt just sitting there in my normal sweater! I don't want to make you feel bad but I was really left out and I wish you weren't giving me such a hard time about making my glow suit.

So let's just make this happen. Do you need my measurements?

________________________

From: Adam Liu
Date: Sun, Dec 5, 2010 at 11:38 PM
To: Fred Sasaki
Date: Sun, Dec 5, 2010 at 12:51 PM
Subject: Re: * Costco Wholesales China Manufacturer / Christmas ledlight,tree,LED tube,bulb,lamp

Hi Fred,

We can make a net led light to wrap you up, wrap you to like a tree, is it ok?

If ok, please advise your measurement.

Please see below pictures:

________________________

From: Fred Sasaki
To: Adam Liu
Date: Mon, Dec 6, 2010 at 1:38 PM
Subject: Re: * Costco Wholesales China Manufacturer / Christmas ledlight,tree,LED tube,bulb,lamp

Hi Adam,

Very very good. I like your idea of netting. But keep in mind I said to wrap me up like a tree just because you weren't understanding me. I really more want to be like Tron or the Last Dragon and at the very least like the Arcade Fire. But I am glad we are getting somewhere.

I wear a size 40R suit, have 32" or 33" inch waist, but I like to wear 34" because I don't like to be pinched on my sides. I am about 5'10" or maybe taller with shoes and am about 165lbs but more like 170lbs. I'm pretty fit so the netting should hang well no pun intended (remember that I won't be wearing clothes). My arms are pretty long by the way.

Do you have a battery pack or something like a generator that I can hook up to this so I can just walk around like a regular person while I'm wearing the netting? I would love something that I could charge by rubbing my thighs together if possible. Or even by punching my fists. Do you have something like that?

Also I would like a helmet or crown of lights that is really really bright. Like a halo. Do you have that too?

Fred

________________________

From: Fred Sasaki
To: Adam Liu
Date: Fri, Dec 10, 2010 at 1:34 PM
Subject: Re: * Costco Wholesales China Manufacturer / Christmas ledlight,tree,LED tube,bulb,lamp

H Adam,

What's the holdup? You know I had a dream that you e-mailed me back, last night. You had various suit options for me to choose from. I would like my dream to come true.

Thank you.

Fred

________________________

From: Adam Liu
To: Fred Sasaki
Date: Sun, Dec 12, 2010 at 6:47 PM
Subject: Re: * Costco Wholesales China Manufacturer / Christmas ledlight,tree,LED tube,bulb,lamp

Hi Fred,

We just can make LED net light to wrap you up.

What color of LEDs do you want?

If you like the LED net light, please wire us US$219.00 by western union:

Below information for western union:

First Name: xxx

Last Name: xxx

Address: xxxxx, xxxxx

After receving your payment, we will arrage the production immediately, and you will receive the product before Dec 22, 2010.

Best regards,

Adam Liu

________________________

From: Fred Sasaki
To: Adam Liu
Date: Mon, Dec 13, 2010 at 1:18 PM
Subject: Re: * Costco Wholesales China Manufacturer / Christmas ledlight,tree,LED tube,bulb,lamp

Hi Adam,

This is great! Can you get it to me in time for Christmas?!

Have you tested this out as a vest? Please send me a picture of you wearing the vest so I can see how it will look. The pants, too. I will want a green outfit and a red one for my companion.

You are making my wish come true!

Thank you!

Fred

________________________

From: Adam Liu < xxx.xxx@gmail.com >
Date: Mon, Dec 13, 2010 at 6:05 PM
To: Fred Sasaki
Subject: Re: * Costco Wholesales China Manufacturer / Christmas ledlight,tree,LED tube,bulb,lamp

Hi Fred,

We have not the net light in stock, so we have not the pictures to show you.

so, do you want a set (vest +pants) of green one, and a set of red one? right?

It will be two sets, right?

If yes, the total charge is US$419.00.

If you want to get the net lights before Dec 24, please wire us the money today.

Otherwise we have not time to produce.

Christmas is coming, many guys is ordering our christmas tree and chrismas led light.

Please kindly understand….

Adam Liu

________________________

From: Fred Sasaki
To: Adam Liu
Date: Mon, Dec 13, 2010 at 6:09 PM
Subject: Re: * Costco Wholesales China Manufacturer / Christmas ledlight,tree,LED tube,bulb,lamp

Adam,

I need to see the vest and pants ON a model. Can you send me a picture of how it looks as a vest and pants?

Fred

________________________

From: Adam Liu
To: Fred Sasaki
Date: Mon, Dec 13, 2010 at 6:16 PM
Subject: Re: * Costco Wholesales China Manufacturer / Christmas ledlight,tree,LED tube,bulb,lamp

Hi Fred,

We have not the net light in stock, so can not show you.

"a size 40R suit, have 32" or 33" inch waist"

What do you mean by "40R"?

how long are your legs? you did not tell me for pants…

You must be a very handsome guy, can you show me your pictures

Please add me on skype, ,my skype: adamliu5217

Best regards,

Adam Liu

________________________

From: Fred Sasaki
To: Adam Liu
Date: Mon, Dec 13, 2010 at 6:33 PM
Subject: Re: * Costco Wholesales China Manufacturer / Christmas ledlight,tree,LED tube,bulb,lamp

Hi Adam,

That is really disappointing. Do you have other lights that you can try on?

How can I send you pictures of me?! I don't even have any lights!

________________________

From: Adam Liu
Date: Mon, Dec 13, 2010 at 6:47 PM
Subject: Re: * Costco Wholesales China Manufacturer / Christmas ledlight,tree,LED tube,bulb,lamp

Hi Fred,

The led light our customers ordered have been dispatched, so have not in stock.

Even though we have other led lights to try on, still can not reach the same effect with net light.

Best regards,

Adam Liu

________________________

From: Fred Sasaki
To: Adam Liu
Date: Tue, Dec 14, 2010 at 1:00 PM
Subject: Re: * Costco Wholesales China Manufacturer / Christmas ledlight,tree,LED tube,bulb,lamp

Ah, but these other lights will look good wrapped around you or me?

And thank you for saying I am handsome! How did you know. What kind of photo do you want?

You send one, too! With the lights on!

________________________

From: Adam Liu
To: Fred Sasaki
Date: Tue, Dec 14, 2010 at 6:18 PM
Subject: Re: * Costco Wholesales China Manufacturer / Christmas ledlight,tree,LED tube,bulb,lamp

Hi Fred,

Please send your pricture of your whole stature, so we can design the net light for you.

Please rush to determine your order, otherwise we have not time to produce.

Best regards,

Adam Liu

________________________

From: Fred Sasaki
To: Adam Liu
Date: Wed, Dec 15, 2010 at 11:24 PM
Subject: Re: * Costco Wholesales China Manufacturer / Christmas ledlight,tree,LED tube,bulb,lamp

OK. I set up the camera and some scenery. What should I wear and how should I pose? On the sofa? I could pose in front of my Christmas tree but the lights might be distracting.

Also do you have a battery pack for my light suit? I don't want to be plugged in. LOL! I see the douche bags by the baseball field wearing lights that are always on. They must have a battery pack of some kind. Something I could stuff in a sock and put in my pants would be perfect. Can you do this?

I'd also like to know if you have lights for the shoes. I want lights that blink when I run or jump, but not when I'm just walking. Like the kids have. I love those.

That should do it.

Thanks,

Fred

________________________

From: Adam Liu
To: Fred Sasaki
Date: Thu, Dec 16, 2010 at 12:14 AM
Subject: Re: * Costco Wholesales China Manufacturer / Christmas ledlight,tree,LED tube,bulb,lamp

Hi Fred,

Pls see my reply below.

Best regards,

Adam Liu

OK. I set up the camera and some scenery. What should I wear and how should I pose? On the sofa? I could pose in front of my Christmas tree but the lights might be distracting.

Pls add me on skype, my skype: adamliu5217

Also do you have a battery pack for my light suit? I don't want to be plugged in. LOL! I see the douche bags by the baseball field wearing lights that are always on. They must have a battery pack of some kind. Something I could stuff in a sock and put in my pants would be perfect. Can you do this?

Yes, battery operated. 3 pcs of AA batteries, or 6 pcs of AA batteries.

I'd also like to know if you have lights for the shoes. I want lights that blink when I run or jump, but not when I'm just walking. Like the kids have. I love those.

Sorry, We can not do this.

________________________

From: Fred Sasaki
To: Adam Liu
Date: Thu, Dec 16, 2010 at 12:34 AM
Subject: Re: * Costco Wholesales China Manufacturer / Christmas ledlight,tree,LED tube,bulb,lamp

I don't understand about the Skype.

How long will the batteries last for? I need ten hours minimum.

Fred

________________________

From: Adam Liu
To: Fred Sasaki
Date: Thu, Dec 16, 2010 at 12:45 AM
Subject: Re: * Costco Wholesales China Manufacturer / Christmas ledlight,tree,LED tube,bulb,lamp

Do you have MSN?

My msn: xxx.xxx@hotmail.com

Pls add me.

It may last abot 12 hours.

Adam Liu

________________________

From: Fred Sasaki
To: Adam Liu
Date: Thu, Dec 16, 2010 at 12:51 AM
Subject: Re: * Costco Wholesales China Manufacturer / Christmas ledlight,tree,LED tube,bulb,lamp

Adam,

I don't have MSN, and I cannot do Skype for 12 hours!

________________________

From: Adam Liu
Date: Thu, Dec 16, 2010 at 12:57 AM
To: Fred Sasaki
Subject: Re: * Costco Wholesales China Manufacturer / Christmas ledlight,tree,LED tube,bulb,lamp

Fred,

Oh, Do not see you on camera, how can we design net light for you?

Ok, please take picutes of your whole stature, and don't wear thick clothes.

Just thine clothes, or better to naked body pictures to me.

Haha, we both are man…

how long are your legs?

How long is it from your waist to your shoulder?

How wide is your two shoulders?

how wide is your waist?

Pls just tell me…

Pls rush to determine, we have not too much time to Christmas.

It will take about 4 days to you by courier.

Best regards,

Adam Liu

________________________

From: Fred Sasaki
To: Adam Liu
Date: Thu, Dec 16, 2010 at 10:38 PM
Subject: Re: * Costco Wholesales China Manufacturer / Christmas ledlight,tree,LED tube,bulb,lamp

Hi Adam,

I got my tape measure and have your measurements. My legs are different measurements depending on where you measure, but my inseam is about 31". My thighs are quite muscular. I would say there is about two feet from my waist to my shoulder but I'm not sure. My shoulders are a size 40, but I prefer to wear 39. European sizes suit me best (15.5). My waist is a 32" or 33" but I like to wear 34" unless the jeans are APC, then I wear 32".

I have two pictures for you. You never said if you know The Last Dragon so I will show you. I want to glow like Bruce Leroy (yellow) who has the power of the glow. The other picture is of Sho'Nuff who is a bad guy. I don't want to be like him but it is a good picture of how I would like to glow, except in red. I still want both suits, though, because sometimes I feel good and sometimes I feel bad.

Let me know what you think of the photos!

Fred

PS. This is a beautiful song for you. 7th Heaven. It is Vanity from The Last Dragon and she is beautiful, too. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ydsKrHN7_N4

2 attachments

________________________

From: Adam Liu
To: Fred Sasaki
Date: Thu, Dec 16, 2010 at 11:44 PM
Subject: Re: * Costco Wholesales China Manufacturer / Christmas ledlight,tree,LED tube,bulb,lamp

Fred,

Now I got your measurement of your stature.

Thanks for the beautiful song.

Please wire us US $419.00 by western union, after receive the payment, we will arrange the production.

Below information for western union:

(Note: please just write "service" for the purpose of payment on the payment slip, or just keep blank, otherwise we can not receive the payment.)

First Name: xxx

Last Name: xxx

Address: xxxxx, xxxxx

Best regards,

Adam Liu

________________________

From: Fred Sasaki fredsasaki@gmail.com
To: Adam Liu
Date:  Fri, Dec 17, 2010 at 8:39 AM
Subject: Re: * Costco Wholesales China Manufacturer / Christmas ledlight,tree,LED tube,bulb,lamp

Do you like the photos, too?

________________________

From: Adam Liu
To: Fred Sasaki
Date: Fri, Dec 17, 2010 at 5:44 PM
Subject: Re: * Costco Wholesales China Manufacturer / Christmas ledlight,tree,LED tube,bulb,lamp

Fred,

I just like the photo "shonuff".

Please send me the wire slip for tracking if made the payemnt…

Best regards,

Adam Liu

________________________

From: Fred Sasaki
To: Adam Liu
Date: Sat, Dec 18, 2010 at 1:32 PM
Subject: Re: * Costco Wholesales China Manufacturer / Christmas ledlight,tree,LED tube,bulb,lamp

OK, you can be Sho'Nuff and I will be Bruce Leroy. Do you have a bow and arrow that you can shoot at me that I can catch in my hands and surprise you?

________________________

From: Adam Liu
To: Fred Sasaki
Date: Sat, Dec 18, 2010 at 5:26 PM
Subject: Re: * Costco Wholesales China Manufacturer / Christmas ledlight,tree,LED tube,bulb,lamp

Bruce Leroy looks like a bad guy.

oh, I find you are very facetious, I like you…

A pity, you will not show me your pictures.

Adam Liu

________________________

From: Adam Liu
To: Fred Sasaki
Date: Tue, Dec 21, 2010 at 8:50 PM
Subject: Re: * Costco Wholesales China Manufacturer / Christmas ledlight,tree,LED tube,bulb,lamp

Fred,

You flied to moon to spend your christmas? can not contact you anymore…

Greeting!

Adam Liu

Previously - Fred Sasaki's Sticker Proposal for the City of Chicago