Oh Good, Someone's Rebuilding the Titanic and Wants to Retrace the Trip
It plans to offer an "authentic Titanic experience" and the director of the project is named Clive Mensink.
Getty Images / Handout / Online USA
Oh, the boundless hubris of mankind. We build powerful robots and force them to dance for our amusement, we kick back and steer motorcycles with our bare feet, we climb on top of moving subway cars in search of internet fame. And now, in yet another example of humanity truly just asking for it, someone is rebuilding the Titanic and plans to retrace the original's path in 2022—hopefully without the whole iceberg disaster part, USA Today reports.
The project is the brainchild of Clive Palmer, an Australian businessman with apparently too much time and money on his hands. The plan is to rebuild the entire Titanic, recreating the original ship's floor plan and bringing along the exact same number of passengers and crew. This one will supposedly have the right amount of lifeboats this time, though.
According to CNN, Palmer and his company, Blue Star Line, first announced the idea back in 2012, but things got tied up for a few years because of some financial troubles. Now the $500 million project is set to launch from Dubai in 2022 where it will do a quick lap to Singapore and back before finally make its way to Southampton to start its weekly trip from the UK to New York.
"Blue Star Line will create an authentic Titanic experience, providing passengers with a ship that has the same interiors and cabin layout as the original vessel, while integrating modern safety procedures, navigation methods, and 21st century technology to produce the highest level of luxurious comfort," Palmer said in a statement.
According to Cruise Arabia, passengers will be able to buy first, second, and third class tickets, but it's not clear if the Titanic II will have separate classes just like the 1912 version, where the rich people drink champagne in tops and tails while the second- and third-class passengers cram themselves inside the ship's crowded underbelly or whatever. From the look of the ship's CG walkthrough, even the lower-class sections seem pretty fancy. They've also got the best parties.
"In 1912 the Titanic was the ship of dreams," Palmer continued. "For over a century Titanic’s legend has been powered by mystery, intrigue and respect for all she stood for. Millions have dreamt of sailing on her, seeing her in port and experiencing her unique majesty. Titanic ll will be the ship where those dreams come true."
And sure, the original Titanic was an iconic ship, but it's unclear where, exactly, Palmer is getting his "millions" number. The James Cameron movie may have been an epic love story that inspired a generation of annoying photos posing at the bow of a boat, but did anyone actually watch that movie and think, Wow, I wish I was on that ship, too?
Oh, and the director of the whole Titanic II project is named Clive Mensink. Men Sink. So, yeah. Nothing to see here. This isn't a cursed endeavor. No chance that it will end up exactly like that made-for-TV disaster movie Titanic II. No chance at all!
Sign up for our newsletter to get the best of VICE delivered to your inbox daily.
Follow VICE on Twitter.