An Australian Man Has Won the Right to Draw a Penis as His Signature

Thirty-three-year-old Jared Hyams is adding literal meaning to the phrase "John Hancock."

by Mitchell Sunderland
Jan 8 2016, 8:00pm

Photo by Flickr user Duncan

After a legal battle in Australia, Melbourne resident Jared Hyams has won the right to draw a penis as his signature. Hyams began drawing a penis and testicles in place of his signature on legal documents in 2010, with an application for a change of address; when he saw his penis had angered authorities, he decided to start using it for everything. But after VicRoads, the road and traffic authority in the Australian state of Victoria, rejected Hyams's interpretive autograph when Hyams used it to apply for a driver's license, Hyams brought the issue to court. A magistrate threw the case out twice, but the Australian newspaper The Age reports Hyams has now won his right to draw a dick on contracts.

"I suppose it shouldn't surprise me at all that people working in government departments aren't so used to questioning in their life," Hyams told Mashable Australia.

In the same interview, he said the debacle started when he was thinking about moving houses. "Every time you move house, you have to fill in new forms," Hyams explained. "I was moving around a bit and had to sign those electoral [registration] forms." He used to draw a line through boxes asking for his signature. He told Mashable that the Australian Electoral Commission always accepted lines as his signature, so one day, he decided to draw a penis instead.

Afterwards, Hyams made the penis his official signature, making the change on his bank cards and attempting to with his driver's license. VicRoads took issue with the signature, Mashable and The Age report, because it resembled an offensive image, but also because it could be easily reproduced.

Although the case sounds silly, it touches on issues about the definition of a signature and how people are allowed to define themselves on paper. In the age of personal branding, though, the porn industry will likely see Hyams's victory as a possible marketing option.

"I think it's a great idea to have your dick as your signature," said porn star Keiran Lee, who claims to have a million-dollar insurance policy on his penis. "I'm jealous I didn't think of it, since I use mine to cash checks on a regular basis!"