The New Mario Kart Made Me Want to Game with Friends Again

Some things never change.

Mario Kart 8, despite its sequels, is a game built on a sturdy foundation, defiantly stable throughout eight console iterations, and echoed by Nintendo's recent adoption of a numerical suffix.

This is by no means a hindrance. The console cycle has supported this incremental change with each new piece of hardware. While sports games have used the yearly model for years to much success, Mario Kart does not require constant repetition.

So with MK8, set for a May 30 American release, you have new characters, new tracks, some new gimmick added on to the mechanic—in this case, magnetic wheels and upside down “futuristic” F-Zero style tracks and a “neat” video replay system—new items, and a range of other typical sequel trappings. This one has markedly high production values, with HD graphics and no-MIDI music.

Regardless, every Mario Kart game has been a 7/10, and this one is no different. Nothing about these games has been groundbreaking in a long time. And that’s OK. Because what’s really important about all Mario Kart games is the experience you have playing it.

Ever since 2003’s Mario Kart Double Dash!!, I have played each entry with a sort of mental checklist:

• learn when to accelerate for the boost at the beginning of the race countdown (one day)
• ravenously unlock all secret characters (four days)
• beat roughly 30 percent of Nintendo staff records “ghosts” in Time Trials (ten days)
• play online once or twice; refuse to learn advance techniques like “snaking” (one day)
• put the game aside and wait until I have a friend (or two or three) who wants to play Mario Kart.

Here's how it shakes out in a fancy pie graph:

With the exception of the last step, this entire process takes about two weeks, before I say, “Great, that was fun. Now I just have to wait 'til my friends want to play.”

Which could take months or years to align because all of my friends aren’t necessarily interested in Mario Kart, even though it certainly feels like the most common gaming experience the general public has with home consoles. Now as an adult, this happens even more sporadically.

With the resurgence of the local multiplayer game, Mario Kart is an important part of the menu. Our pals, Sportsfriends, have just released their collection of games; the DIY arcade is verifiably a “thing” now, and designers and players really value this social experience over the online inhuman multiplayer that has come to dominate the meaning of the multiplayer feature.

So I thought it would perhaps be better time spent reviewing who to play MK8 with, rather than MK8 itself. You know what to expect from the game—it’s Mario Kart. But what about the people we play with?

Anytime you first pop in a Mario Kart you’re probably going to have to relearn the controls for a bit. People who play games on a regular basis, who read about and actively consume games from the AAA market and elsewhere, are no exception. After a few races, they get the hang of it and become competent players, which is their strong suit. They are genuinely great to play with. But not long into the session attention inevitably shifts to another game.

It’s impossible to play the game without meta-criticism going on during play. We discussed new features in depth. For example, why does Mario Kart TV (the video replay “editing” feature and social platform) exist? Who is it for? We talked about how the controls feel on the numerous control setups (which includes nearly every combination of Wii-Mote peripheral, Wii U Gamepad, Pro Controller, but no Wavebird) and how and if the Wii U is going to bounce back when Ninetendo contionues to rest on its laurels by making strange design choices. (8/10)

We've all met them. Surprisingly numerous, boastful go-Kart experts haven’t sharpened their skills since the 90s, and thus have become an annoying lot to play Mario Kart with, not to mention the sorest losers. “Oh well, I’m really good at the Nintendo 64 version,” they say. And good for them. I am not good at many activities I haven’t done in twenty years.

Eventually when they lose, they blame you for having played a Mario Kart game more recently than them. (While some people are readily interested in playing updated versions, I, for one, don’t have four N64 controllers lying around.) They go home, they don’t sleep that night. You start getting phone calls in the middle of the night, just someone breathing. They plan an elaborate scheme, inviting you over to their house; they make sure you sit down with them and play Mario Kart on their “setup”. If they have a working N64, they almost certainly don’t have fully functioning control pads, or worse, offer you some third party hardware equivalent like the SharkPad Pro, the worst controller ever made.

And then, if you lose, they have this elated sense of victory. They will point their index finger in your face, expressing some combination of laughter and tears. They feel vindicated from their shitty lucite pride. (3/10)

Alcohol, the historical social lubricant that it is, reinvigorated mascot go-karting for my friends and I when we discovered “Drunk Mario Kart”. It's a physical “mod” (or special “house rules”) that we started playing in college. Here's how it works:

• Everyone takes an 8 oz. can of beer
• Each player must finish their beer before the race ends
• Players cannot be drinking while touching their controller

You get drunk very quickly. The game fades into the background, not unlike the alcohol. When this ruleset is in effect, the aforementioned “boost start” to Mario Kart’s function as a social experience. Of course, alcohol only serves to accelerate this process, but Mario Kart is best as a shared moment for friends. It’s the game we all likely share. Even those who don’t have gaming as a regular part of their lives. (10/10)

No one was online because the game’s not out yet, and all the other videogame outlets broke their street date with their reviews. (0/10)

I wonder what it’s like to play with me, so I asked a few of the people I played with. I won a lot, but I offered them beer and pizza. (7/10)

I didn’t want to give Mario Kart a features-focused review. However there are some mechanical changes inexplicably missing for a troubled console with a unique controller. The Wii U GamePad is again useless, forcing you to always have it on while playing. Can you make it into a rearview mirror? Nope. Can you use it as a separate screen so the other players can have more room to play on the television screen? Nope. Can you use it as a useless air horn? Yes.

The only real useful purpose of the Gamepad is to put up the course’s mini-map, the utility of which I am uncertain of.

At a time when Nintendo needs to shock-and-awe fans back to their hardware, you’d think we’d be seeing some great uses of the controller, which is certainly not the case when most all the games only allow you to use it as an optional peripheral. This has been the case with literally every Wii U game, save Nintendoland, I have played thus far. This weird phenomena continues—when I had the Wii, I would opt to always use the Gamecube’s Wavebird, and now with the Wii U I prefer any Wii-mote controller over the Gamepad.

Maybe it’s just me. But why is that?

How about this “neat” video-editing MKTV being controlled by the pad with, like, actual editing capabilities? Or letting players control the Lakitu‘s camera? How about a fifth player? How about something to change up the gameplay, say by having a player dynamically change the tracks on the Gamepad while the other players scramble on the TV? How about level creation tools? How about ModNation Racers/LittleBigPlanet-style community focused on content creation? How about anything to take advantage of this unique hardware?

At the end of the day, it’s Mario Kart. It’s a great game to play with other people. You’ve played it before, and if you want, you can play it again. You’ll like it. This time it’s in HD.