A couple of weeks ago, VICE wrote about the Sexy Beyond Burger Halloween costume that had just been released by online underwear dealer Yandy.com, and we joked that one of the only unnecessarily sexualized concepts they didn't offer was a Sexy Can of White Claw.
Yandy might've noticed, because a trademark-sidestepping Sexy 'Hard Outlaw' bodysuit soon materialized on its website. When we covered that —yes, this is news, so we've saved you a fussy tweet, Brendan—we said that all Yandy needed was a Sexy Popeye's Chicken Sandwich… and you know exactly where this is going, right?
On Thursday, Yandy released a $79.95 'Sold Out Chicken Sandwich' costume, because of course they did. The high- and low-cut velour bodysuit has been printed with what is supposed to be a piece of Popeyes chicken, embellished with two ruffled pickles, and stamped with the words SOLD OUT because girl, did you ever.
"Winner, winner chicken dinner… or so you thought. A few too many fast food lovers fantasized about this five star fried feast," the costume's description reads. "Is it due to that unbelievable batter or maybe its drool-worthy bun? Either way, these seasoned breasts will be back on full display in no time." (This is honestly no worse than anything E.L. James ever wrote.)
According to Yandy, potential customers actually reached out to the company to ask if they'd be turning that unnamed chicken sandwich into something wearable. "We were already in the midst of updating our top sexy food costumes for 2019 when the infamous chicken sandwich war happened," Alicia Thompson, Yandy's Director of Brand Marketing told VICE in an email.
She credited Pilar Quintana Williams, the company's vice president of merchandising, with bringing the concept to life. "She set to work designing a version that would speak to the Yandy aesthetic and current fashion trends in a bodysuit silhouette," Thompson said. "The pickle peplum and sleeve puffs had to be just right.
As of this writing, the costume has only been available for a half-day, so the company did not have any sales numbers available. If the "Yandy aesthetic" speaks to you, and you're OK with encasing your labia in hastily assembled velour, then you know where to find this.
OK Yandy, we're gonna try this again: The only thing your website doesn't offer is a Sexy Arthur Fleck costume. Do it, we dare you.