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Munchies

Spring Break Bros Anger World by Using Beached Shark to Shotgun Beer

The Instagram account has previously posted videos of bros using a starfish as a beer luge and shotgunning a beer with a jellyfish in it.

by Alex Swerdloff
Mar 20 2017, 5:35pm

Screengrab via Instagram user totalfratmove

You don't have to have woken up in the burnt-out husk of a Daytona Beach fire engine—one that's been repurposed to spray out a mixture of nacho cheese and K-Y Jelly, of course—to understand that shit tends to get a wee bit out-of-hand during Spring Break. But there's gotta be an uncrossable line, right?

Maybe not.

In an act of bro-dom that seems both unfortunate and inevitable, a shirtless Spring-Break-goer was recorded using the teeth of a beached shark to open, and then shotgun, a can of beer.

Since the video was posted by Total Frat Move on Instagram two days ago, it has been viewed more than 571,000 times. What's more, the post has been commented on more than 2,300 times—and nearly all of the comments deride the asshats in the video.

For example, clhenderson143 wrote, "I'd love to get a can and smash it in your face til it opens, I'd make sure the first blow was hard enough to hurt but didn't open so I could enjoy hitting you again."

Someone named will_healis_ said, "If only that shark was able to take a bite out of your leg them maybe that would teach you a lesson. Fucking disgusting for doing this"

READ MORE: Andrew Cuomo's Massive Shark Catch Has Landed Him in Troubled Waters

While most of the commenters thought the video was a degradation of one of God's magnificent creatures, others—like benjamin_rodgers—just wanted to let all of Instagram know that "sharks r gay." Thanks for that, Internet!

Total Frat Move has more than 1.1 million followers and bills itself as "the most dangerously entertaining Instagram in the game." Its feed is filled with images and videos of frat bros doing stupid shit and images of the occasional hot girl.

But if you want to see TFM at its finest, check out its other Instagram channel, TFM Spring Break, which uploaded the shark video as well. A cursory glance of that feed reveals a litany of Spring Break animal abuse. One video, posted a week ago, shows a bro holding a seagull and putting it in the face of his off-camera friends, as the bird desperately struggles to free itself. Another video, posted less than 24 hours ago, shows some dude putting a jellyfish into a punctured beer can and shotgunning it down, jellyfish and all. Yet another shows a man floating in a pool using a starfish as a beer luge.

Please tell us that the entitled and educated ranks of America's youth have something better to do during their downtime than violate and desecrate animals in the name of getting totally faded. Please? Hello?