COSMETICS ARE ALL TOUGH NOW

Canada has a track record for producing some of the ugliest, most bearded bands alive. That's probably why Vancouver's Cosmetics were totally off anyone's radar until they signed to Captured Tracks a few weeks ago. Suddenly everyone is realizing that not only are they a Canuck band that doesn't look like cross-eyed grunge hockey hosers with healthcare funded pain killer addictions, but they also write exquisitely sinister and moody dance tracks. Who doesn't like soft-spoken breathy repetitive vocals about leather and pleasure? So good! They've been compared to groups like Glass Candy or Chromatics but they have a darker tone, like a less suicidal and anti-social Dark Day or Malaria!. Plus they're also a couple, and couple bands totally rule (Pierced Arrows and Lullabye Arkestra, doye). I don't mean to get all emo and whatnot but anyone who can live, work, and be creative together, and not constantly want to just choke each other out with microphone cables should be heartily commended.

Vice: You guys have shacked up. You're in love. How's that working for you?

Nic: I always knew that if I was ever in a band, I wanted it to be a creative partnership like The Cramps. I would read about Lux Interior and Poison Ivy and be like, "That's what I want." A really close partnership, not just going to band practice once a week, but working towards something every day, doing every aspect of it. So it's an extension of our normal lives…

Aja: The furthest we ever get apart from each other is this giant wall that separates us at work, I always hear him screaming and laughing at something funny, I think he just harasses his co-worker all day.

Nic: That guy has an attitude problem.

So you guys even have day jobs together in some kind of mysterious fashion warehouse right?

Aja: Nic buys jewellery and sunglasses from wholesalers. I do graphics. Hold on a sec [sounds of cavorting and general office merriment] My boss just came into the art department with this CRAZY studded leather jacket with arms cut out, but Nic won't let me wear it, he thinks it's a little too insane. What do you mean insane?

Aja: I think when it has so much metal poking out of it that the leather is hardly visible, it could physically hurt someone if you got too close to them.

Awww, he just wants to be close to you. Tell me about your last show. I heard it got violent?

Aja: It was in this totally illegal dungeon basement. It was so packed everyone was going totally crazy, because I don't know… it was a dungeon and everyone was wasted.

Nic: Aja got completely lost in the crowd, I saw blonde hair popping up once in a while, my synth kept coming unplugged… Totally out of control… lots of wasted underage turkeys, it was fun.

Aja: My microphone cord was so danced on it just broke in half eventually.

Nic: Then I came up to the street to load out our gear after the show and found Felix (our new drummer) with some Ed Hardy douche bag in a head lock, just punching him in the face and crushing the guy's foot with his Cuban heels at the same time. There was a second guy nearby already covered in blood yelling at Felix, calling him a "chink." He got a beating first, I guess. It was hilarious because Felix is tiny and these guys were like juiced up gorillas. Apparently these dum dums were picking on a bunch of goofy 60's mod type dudes. Y'know, paisley and eyeliner, kind of like historical fashion re-enactors. Easy target, right? Total wimps. Anyway, Felix saved them. He took care of business…Then the cops came and shut the venue down.

Based on the fight?

Nic: Yeah. bloodshed at a Cosmetics show! Who would have thought? We need to build up our reputation a bit because I don't think people take us seriously. We're tough now.

Aja: You want to get in another fight…

SOFT SKIN/BLACK LEATHER GLOVES
out now on Captured Tracks.