This week: A guy was arrested for Snapchatting a dick doodle, and a guy allegedly tried to burn down his apartment because he was asked to stop jerking off.
Cry-Baby #1: Lincolnshire Police
H/T Hook News
The incident: A guy took a Snapchat of a cop and drew some dicks over the top.
The appropriate response: Nothing.
The actual response: His phone was confiscated, and he was forced to pay an $800 fine and do community service.
Last summer, 20-year-old builder Jordan Barrack witnessed a bar fight in Lincoln, England.
He was taken to Sleaford police station to give a statement about what he saw.
While he was waiting to be interviewed, he sneaked a photo of police constable Charles Harris, the interviewing officer. "[PC Charles] was writing things down, and I just sat there bored out of my head, so I got my phone out and thought I would be a bit cocky and did it," Jordan told the Lincolnshire Echo.
He then drew two penises on the picture, before sending it to some friends.
Once the police officers discovered what he'd done, they seized his phone and charged him with "posting a grossly offensive, obscene picture on a social media site."
Appearing at Lincoln Magistrates Court last week, Jordan pleaded guilty to the charge. He was ordered to pay the officer $650 in compensation, as well as $150 in court fees. He also has to complete 40 hours of unpaid community service.
Speaking to the court, Jordan said, "I am terribly sorry, and it was a massive mistake, and I shouldn't have done it."
He later told the Lincolnshire Echo that he was "massively shocked" by the fine. "People have come up to me and said they can't believe it got to court and said it was a waste of taxpayers' money."
Jordan said that, despite the fact that five months have passed since the initial incident and the case is now over, he is yet to receive his phone back.
Cry-Baby #2: Kenneth Haskins
The incident: A guy was asked to stop masturbating in front of the open window of his apartment.
The appropriate response: Stopping.
The actual response: He allegedly tried to burn down his apartment complex.
On Sunday night of last week, firefighters were called to a blaze at the Mar Plaza apartment complex in Tampa, Florida.
After evacuating 28 people, they were able to put the fire out in about 30 minutes. Nobody was injured, though four people were left homeless.
An investigation revealed that the fire had started in two separate areas of an apartment belonging to a man named Kenneth Haskins. A flammable liquid had been used to accelerate the blaze.
A neighbor told police that Kenneth had admitted to starting the fire.
Kenneth, who suffers from a facial disfigurement as a result of a shotgun accident, was arrested and charged with felony arson.
Police say that Kenneth admitted to them that he'd set the fire to get back at the company that manages the apartment complex.
He'd reportedly been told by the property managers that he had to stop masturbating in front of the open windows and doors of his apartment—a request that he felt was unfair.
Kenneth is currently being held without bail.
Which of this lot is the bigger cry-baby? Let us know in this poll right here:Who is the bigger cry-baby?
Winner: The school!!!