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Munchies

A Girl Copied My Nutella-Only Diet and Called Me a Pussy

I ate nothing but Nutella for a week and wrote about how shitty it was. Later, this girl tried it and said it was easy. I called her to disagree.

by David Allegretti
May 26 2015, 8:40pm

Me at day six, well and truly in the N-hole.

I'm David Allegretti. Recently I wrote an article about my experience of living on nothing but Nutella for a week. It was a horrible seven days and I learned that food has an enormous influence over my mental well-being. In that week, everything was dark.

Alix at day six. Whatever.

And then I got a tweet from a total stranger. Her name was Alix Giboulot and she was 19 years-old, living in London, and eating nothing but Nutella. A #nutellachallenge she called it, although the term wasn't trending (I searched instantly) and prior uses of it seemed intriguingly off-topic. Anyway, Alix told me she was five days into the diet, finding it easy, and that I was a pussy. So rather than let some girl insult me from a distance, I got her number and called her up. Obviously I was flattered that my dumb stunt had attracted attention from a female, but there was also a part of me that wanted to discuss the nuances of my ordeal. She was the only one who'd understand.

VICE: Hey Alix, how are you feeling?
Alix Giboulot: Still alive, but smelling other people's food is killing me. I still think you are a pussy or maybe not Swiss enough. Do you still eat Nutella?

Yeah I still eat Nutella. I've been putting some in my coffee every morning which is something I discovered while on the diet. But what do you mean I'm not Swiss enough?
I'm Swiss which might explain the chocolate tolerance. But I did have to sit down in the shower this morning. I admire your perseverance.

You know what screams 'student'? That heater in the background.

Right, let's start at the beginning. Why did you take on this Nutella thing?
Because like you, I eat Nutella in amounts that surprise people. It all started because my friends were so used to seeing worrying amounts of empty Nutella pots around my room. So my friend Eva sent me your article as an overdose warning. After reading it and seeing that you felt bad, had diarrhea, and all that stuff, I thought of all the times I had survived on Nutella for 3-4 days without incentive. I figured I could do it, and with panache. So Eva offered a week of free groceries if I could get it done, and we spiced it up by saying I couldn't drink anything that wasn't water or tea. I loaded up on Nutella at Sainsbury's and the next morning we started the challenge. Now here I am, on day five, and if I make the whole week I'll have three friends who owe me 5 kilograms [11 pounds] of fruit each. It's a no brainer really.

What food are you craving most?
I'm craving fruit so badly. Even the trees smelled amazing this morning.

Alix, part of the way through her self-imposed ordeal.

A few days after her week-long ordeal was over, I spoke to Alix again to see how it all ended.

Hey Alix, how are you feeling?
Better than I expected, and full of energy actually. My ego was satisfied by the challenge, and my belly by the terrifying quantities of food I've been eating since. Temptation grew stronger every day of the Nutella week, but I felt great, finished three 750g pots, wasn't sick and survived an exam. Overall I'm quite pleased with the challenge.

I know this feeling. The poking at the brown, and the rubbish bag hanging above the bin. All of it.

Why do you think Nutella has such a cultish appeal?
From what I hear, humans are just wired to love fat and Nutella is a high-end unique fix. I've only met one person who didn't like it and that person was wearing a t-shirt that read, "It won't suck itself." I think that sums it up.

And did you lose much weight?
My weight was surprisingly normal throughout the week. I oscillated between 59.4 and 60.1 kg [130-132 lbs].

Alix, after the challenge. Not sure what that is but it possibly looks like real food.

Your body handled it much better than mine. What do you think you learned from the experience?
Just that I enjoy food in such a different way now. I think everyone should do a Nutella (or anything) challenge. I don't know how it was for you David, but the first meals, after having resisted temptation for a week, were an almost spiritual experience. Now I love food more than ever.

Follow David on Twitter.