Poor Jennifer Lawrence suffered a flood after foolishly discarding a collection of crystals found in her new home. In a recent cover story, the actor told Vogue that she didn't "want people to come over… and think I'm a crystal person," adding, "I hate crystals." According to Lawrence, "everyone" informed her that it would be dangerous to remove the crystals without professional assistance. "You have to have the crystal lady who put them in move them," everyone said.
"I just had all the crystals yanked out. Sold them," she told the magazine. "And then my fucking house flooded."
Crystals are popular objects. They are often perceived to be spiritual, possessing distinct energetic properties that can influence the life of the person who possess them. Amethyst is said to be powerfully healing; citrine can make you rich; agate calms inner turmoil. A Gaia.com report elucidates their allure: "They speak to us in ways that we know we must bring them home," the website reads.
Perhaps Jennifer Lawrence felt that, by rejecting crystals, she would come across as relatable and low maintenance, in contrast to the rest of Hollywood, which is notably crystal-obsessed. Spencer Pratt is obviously the most prominent crystal person in the entertainment industry. Since the halcyon days of The Hills, other celebrities have turned to crystals as well: As The Cut catalogued, Adele, David and Victoria Beckham, Katy Perry, Kate Hudson, Anne Hathaway, and many other elite people have tapped into the well of power that crystals contain.
(When reached for comment about the proper care and keeping of crystals, Pratt, who has been publicly critical of Lawrence's comments, responded, "Keep any peeps with energy like JLAW far away from your crystals.")
But crystals are not a mere celebrity fad, cautions Jessica Lanyadoo, an astrologer and psychic medium who has been working with these mystical earthen objects since high school. "If you are a person who is attuned to nuance, and if you are sensitive to subtle energies, then you are likely to be directly impacted by crystals," she tells Broadly.
While Lanyadoo is taken aback by Lawrence's aggressive dislike of the objects—"Who hates crystals? They're so pretty!" she exclaims—she doubts that crystals cursed poor Jennifer Lawrence's house. Crystals would not do something like that, nor are they "weapons of spontaneous flooding," she affirms.
With that said, there are some existing best practices for disposing of unwanted crystals. "Generally speaking, gifting a stone or tarot deck that's bunk for you is a good way to clear the block," she says. If you're actually into crystals, be sure to clear them first. "Think of it as when you get a refurbished computer—you want it to work, unencumbered by the previous user's programs and bugs."
How does one go about clearing crystals? Lanyadoo suggests using sage or Palo Santo wood: "Light it up and use the smoke as a psychic dust buster," she instructs. Or you can "charge" one by placing it in moonlight. Lanyadoo's personal favorite method for clearing a stone is sticking it in the freezer for a few days.
Particularly fervent crystal enthusiasts will say that crystals need to be treated with great care, almost as though they're alive. In my previous reporting on witchcraft and powerful curses, I uncovered a private Facebook group for queer witches. One user had posted publicly, asking for help with their crystals, and fretting that they'd callously misused them: "Does anyone else notice that the crystals themselves are despairing and hurting?" this witch. "Lately, I can't even pick mine up without getting hit by this feeling of the whole crystal world crying out in pain." At the post's conclusion, they claimed to be preparing their crystal for burial—a final act of generosity to end the object's suffering.
One can only imagine how this witch would feel about someone who forcibly "yanked" crystals from their home and unapologetically sold them off.
"If you don't like crystals, don't mess with them," Lanyadoo says. "Crystals are like people: They're not for everyone. But I feel it's important to reiterate that they will not bring a plague upon your home if you are mad at them or pay people to remove them."
Nonetheless, her final advice instills a sense of caution for the crystal-critical among us: "If you ever find yourself in the position to buy yourself a house that has crystals actually embedded into its structure and you don't like crystals, maybe don't buy the house."