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Food by VICE

Beware of Flaming Vodka Shots If You’re Hairy-Chested

The internet has many what-not-to-do videos of frat boys lighting their heads, hair, etc. on fire after trying to do flaming shots, but this particular example takes the cake.

by Hilary Pollack
Jan 23 2015, 5:29pm

Flaming shots are a (sort of) fun novelty, perpetually turning up in sports bars, college watering holes, and strip clubs. Behold as we turn ourselves into human circus freaks, impervious to the clear and present danger of a flickering Slippery Nipple!

But what first-timers may not realize is that the key to drinking your cute little 151-topped candle without accidentally melting off your lips and chin is to put it out with your hand first or blow it out before you throw a glass of flaming liquid all over your face (or hopefully, down your gullet).

Unfortunately, this is a lesson that some can only learn through an unpleasant and embarrassing experience.

The internet is replete with what-not-to-do videos of polo-shirt-wearing frat boys lighting their entire heads, torsos, hair, etc. aflame after trying to be a hard-assed Cool Guy Joe whose plan to flex his fearlessness has totally backfired.

But the Flaming Shots Darwin Award goes to the men in this video, who have decided to have a cheerful evening of drinking literal fire-water in spite of the danger posed by their generously hairy chests, hovering over their hot vodka smorgasbord.

As seen in the video, a couple of the men do just fine with their shots (cheers, chaps), but one drools a little bit of blue-flaming booze out of the corner of his mouth and onto his robust pectoral carpet, which it swiftly ignites.

Thankfully, his friends notice his distress as all of his body hair turns to charred dust, and sweetly leap to attention to help him pat it out before he turns into a human kebab.

Pro tip for those who insist on consuming vials of burning liquid for the sake of demonstrating machismo: grab a straw or purse your lips, because you look like a damn fool hopping around and trying to extinguish yourself.

To the hairy-chested, we feel for you; but your masculinity is visible right below your shoulders, and need not be proven by something as silly as an self-arsonous kamikaze shot.