President Trump just got back from a 12-day tour of Asia, stopping off in five different countries to hang out with world leaders from China's president Xi Jinping to Russia's Vladimir Putin. It seemed like he had a blast, getting a chance to do big boy stuff and shake a lot of hands, even if he didn't score too many Ws for the US. If you didn't have a chance to follow the trip, don't worry—the president's crack video team put together a recap, and it's a doozy. Sound on, please:
There's a lot of weird shit to unpack here, beginning with whatever's going on with this song, which sounds kind of like a trance version of Ed Sheeran's "Shape of You," mixed by the guy who made that banger Paul Ryan picked for his blizzard cam.
Then there's the absolute glut of slow-motion shots, mostly applied to things that don't really belong in slow-motion. The president's car, for instance, drives at about five MPH, straight ahead, in slo-mo; a guard turns his head slightly to the left, in slo-mo; Trump walks a whole lot, in slo-mo. Not to mention those bikes at the beginning of the video, which are moving backwards for some reason.
To Trump's credit, this video is objectively better than a lot of his other on-camera appearances. His Halloween video, for example, was actually just a bunch of still photographs spliced together way too quickly, like something you might throw together on iMovie in about two-and-a-half minutes.
It's worth noting that some particularly memorable moments were missing from Trump's Asia recap, too. We didn't get a look at the protesters who greeted him in Hawaii with "Welcome to Kenya" signs. Nor, for that matter, the thousands of anti-Trump demonstrators in Manila who built a massive sculpture of him in the shape of a swastika.
While we do get a glimpse of whatever this weird handshake was, we missed out on the time Trump poured a whole box of fish food into a koi pond in Japan and the bitter fight between the wind and his delicate hair. The video also failed to capture that weird moment Philippines president Rodrigo Duterte—a man accused of sanctioning thousands of extrajudicial killings—sang Trump a nice little song.
Take a look at Team Trump's sweet mini-doc above, and appreciate it for what it is: a weird, fleeting look at a weird, fleeting trip.
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