What VICE Readers Bought This Month: Deadhead Aprons, Massagers, and Spices

If there’s one thing we learned about you this month, dear readers, it’s that you are an eclectic bunch. You're cooking Ethiopian food and listening to the Grateful Dead, but you're also a bunch of horny and spicy little toads who are upgrading your sex toy arsenal whilst  donning Abercrombie and Fitch polos. You spoil your cats, pound out your muscles with affordable Theragun dupes, and still find time to pick up a pair of Bernie-inspired mittens. 

You're a funky crew, and we wouldn't have it any other way. Here are the Rec Room reader bestsellers for October 2021, from tie-dyed aprons to luxury lube. 

Welcome to the Abercrombie Renaissance. Only this time, it’s not all Y2K popped polo collars and pre-teen anxiety. Instead, we’re getting swept off our feet by Tony Soprano-worthy ‘fits, faux-leather trucker jackets, and a bunch of other great normcore-leaning apparel. Your favorite this month was this knit polo that channels both Tony Soprano and skater-babe-at-the-casino energy. 

This is a traditional Ethiopian spice blend whose ingredients will vary from household to household, but will usually include pepper, paprika, garlic, salt, fenugreek leaves, and more, and it's featured in a number of popular MUNCHIES dishes. “Berbere forms the flavor base of classic dishes such as doro wot and misir wot,” explains the Spice House, “Like baharat and ras el hanout, it is ubiquitous in the land.” Sounds like you've been making doro wat, a spicy Ethiopian chicken stew. 

The Grateful Dead x Hedley & Bennett collab

Looks like y’all run on Jerry Time, too, because you scooped the bejesus out of this Hedley & Bennett x The Grateful Dead collaboration, which includes their signature, sturdy springs in tie-dye and denim aprons. Look close enough, and you can even see the little kitchen utensils the bears are holding. No shroomies necessary. 

Just look at that hot little Gonzo nose. The Enigma is a combination Pizza Hut and Taco Bell G-spot and clitoral vibrator by LELO, which is hands down, ass up our favorite luxurious Swedish sex toy company, and it really is out here doing the most; as one of our writers said in their review of the toy, it nails that feeling of getting really bomb head. We can't blame y'all for being curious… it really is that good. 

I’ll say it. You know what sounds bomb? Yuletide Turkey, straight from the can, with a side of Sweet Potato, also from the can. The cats can have some too, obviously. (This one was also featured in our best gifts for cat lovers.)

Lubricant so stylish, it looks like the kind of swanky gin you bust out to impress people. In addition to being easy on the eyes, Überlube is odorless, water-friendly, and vitamin E-enriched so that your nethers feel both juiced, hydrated, slippery, and more erudite. The Thinking Man’s Lube. Find it most recently in the best sex toys and lubes for prostate orgasms. 

This cheap Theragun alternative is one of our editor’s favorite post-workout tools. As he explained in a review, “I was kicking around the ol’ Amazon-dot-com when I came across this Olsky Handheld Electric Body Massager, which only costs 50 bucks—rather than the Theragun PRO’s hefty $599 price tag—and has a full 5-star rating.” The verdict? It’s a full body blaster, ready to gently tenderize you into some well-deserved R&R.   

Maude makes beautiful, elevated sexual wellness products. As in, should-be-on-Georgia-O’Keeffe’s-nighstand beautiful, because the brand’s vibrator designs are always minimal, effortlessly chic, and look as if they were carved from the terra cotta earth of a holy desert rock. The latex condoms are just as vibey, and are some of our faves that don’t smell like balloons.  

Looking a little too good on the bathroom shelf is this residue-free, plant-based deodorant by Le Labo, which deserves every bit of meme-flattery it gets. Hands down, pits up: It’s one of our favorite men’s deodorants.  

Y’all love humping this sex toy 

For those who prefer to mechanical bull ride their vibrators, the Ruby Glow sex toy is a veritable reverse-crotch saddle for humping and grinding. “Unlike other slim vibes,” explained Archie Bongiovanni in our roundup of the best humpling sex toys, “This vibrator wants to be full-on straddled and have you just go at it. It has a textured side and a smooth side, each with their own vibration, and practically begs you to relax your body into its curved shape for a good time.”

One of our editors reviewed these $30 Stradivarius jeans that went viral on TikTok, and they’re kind of… amazing?? They’re made of organic cotton, and have a fit that’s “lifting, cinching, and yet as comfortable as a pair of sweats.” Perfect, if you’re a millennial who doesn’t know where to go after skinny jeans. 

I am once again asking you to order yourself some artisanal, oatmeal-y mittens for fall that look like the ones Senator Sanders wore to the inauguration. They were one of the best costumes for Halloween from this year’s weirdest viral memes, but they’re also just really cozy.

One of our favorite sex toys that feel like getting real oral, the Fleshlight Turbo is master of imitating lips, throat, and tongue action in that icy-colored tube. They don’t call us Jack Frost (sorry mom; sorry god) for nothing. 

Why does it look like it should be playing a saxophone, or star in a prequel to Howard the Duck? The people cried for spooky Halloween ‘fits, and we answered with the absolute gnarliest masks we could find. We’re so sorry. 

If there were one clitoral toy to have a cult, it would be the Satisfyer Pro 2, which has a deep-set, air pulse contact vibrator head that really makes it feel like someone is eating you out. But like, someone with good credit and fancy laundry soap. Find all the details in our review of the vibe. 

Enjoy your goods, you horny toads.  

The Rec Room staff independently selected all of the stuff featured in this story.