The Best and Worst Ways to Die, According to Drag Superstars Trixie & Katya

Watch Trixie Mattel and Katya Zamolodchikova debate the merits of dying in your sleep and dish advice on turning your funeral into the most poppin' post-mortem party in history.

by Amelia Capaz
Nov 22 2017, 5:26pm

As humans, we have all been blessed with a certain caliber of individuality: No two people are the same, and no two journeys are quite alike. However, there are some rituals that all of us must partake in: We all eat, we all shit, we all breathe, and, thankfully, we all die.

On the second episode of THE TRIXIE & KATYA SHOW, world-renowned drag stars Trixie Mattel and Katya Zamolodchikova explore the most (and least) ideal ways to bite the dust—from dying during a sound sleep to being viciously defaced and dismembered. Some options, needless to say, are far more appealing than the others.

If you could choose between ways to face your eventual end, would you? "None of them sound great," according to Trixie, but the ladies have no problem imagining the most treacherous probable outcomes. What’s the worst way to go? Having your legs diced up like tomatoes? Being buried alive with no way out? Or maybe being attacked by a gastrointestinal parasite in the depths of the jungle? You be the judge.

Katya suggests that regardless of how you exit, throwing a poppin’ post-mortem party once thy can is kicked is essential. "My funeral is going to be just like my wedding," she says, "$150 ticket, limited seating, a helicopter, some kind of explosion, and good food. In and out." We aren’t judging her—why not go out with a (literal) bang? Make your sendoff memorable for the rest of us, will you?

Now, there aren’t technically any rules to dying, but please, croak courteously. For example, if you’re an A-List celebrity, give a B-List celebrity the chance to die first so that your death doesn't "take their shine." Pass on politely if you can.

If you’d like more advice on how or when to drop, tune into the new TRIXIE & KATYA SHOW. And, whatever you do, try not to die before tonight’s episode.

Airing at 10 PM on VICELAND.