Rightly, there's been a lot of attention on the groups victimized by the Trump presidency: women, Muslims, the LGBTQ community, environmentalists, and refugees. But what about apathetic narcissists like me? Truly, how am I meant to focus relentlessly on my issues when I'm continually being forced to protest Trump's garbage leadership? All this activism is just exhausting for self-involved assholes like myself.
Normally, Valentine's Day would be a prime time to act like a self-indulgent douchebag, but lately my heart's just not been into it. It's hard to get worked up about dying alone when there's true ugliness in the world: Islamophobic immigration policies, Trump's inexplicably ham-like face, or Kellyanne Conway's inauguration outfit. Only kidding! I'm still a selfish asshole. But am I too much of a selfish asshole to ever find love? To find out, I asked a bunch of psychics. Here's what they said.You're not going to die without having a long-term, committed relationship. That doesn't mean you won't die alone, though. You could have a loving, committed relationship and still die alone.
I'm seeing the number two. You're going to meet someone in February, the second month of the year. Also, stop staying at home. They're not going to come knocking at your door! You've got to get out. Or, entertain people at your own home. You might want to contact people you haven't seen for a while. I think you're going to meet someone you feel very comfortable with towards the end of February. Let me just tune in here.
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