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You Need to Watch This ‘Baroness Von Sketch’ Skit on Sex Assault Cases

The CBC show summarized all the ways Canadian cops hurt rape survivors in about four minutes.
Screencap of cop on phone
Image courtesy 'Baroness Von Sketch'

One year into the #MeToo movement, we’re now seeing powerful men who were called out for abuses staging comebacks, while familiar questions about why rape victims don’t go to police, or why they wait so long to report are popping up once again. It’s enough to make a girl wonder if some of us need a refresher.

Thankfully the CBC sketch comedians from Baroness Von Sketch have laid out the basics for us in a four-minute roast of police practices in Canada. Seemingly inspired by Globe and Mail reporter Robyn Doolittle’s year-long investigation into how police departments across the country handle rape complaints, the skit illustrates what it’s like to be on the phone with cops unwilling to investigate rape or even give victims information.

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Pretty quickly in the sketch we learn Aurora Browne is standing in for all the women who did the right thing and reported a rape to police. We learn she even went to the hospital and got a rape test done, and has been persistently and politely seeking an update on her file for years.

“Maybe it fell off a shelf… into a lab?” she asks.

Meredith MacNeill is really the star of the show here as the very put-upon cop, lamenting how hard it is for her to literally do nothing. “There’s no federal law mandating the tracking and testing of rape kits, OK?” she says. “So our hands are kinda tied.”

“That sounds awful,” replies Browne. “You know what else is awful?”

As you can probably guess, the other awful thing is being raped. But pointing out this trauma doesn’t seem to end the futile charade. After some shuffling with files and some other creative stonewalling, the cop lets a dart throw decide this case goes in the “unfounded” pile.

Last year Doolittle found one in five reported rapes in Canada were designated as “unfounded”—a figure that was wildly inconsistent between police departments. The report prompted more than 100 police departments to review the way they investigate sexual assault, and reopen unfounded cases. Still, Browne points out the figure remains at one in seven cases.

“Can you imagine that many unfounded murders?” she asks.

If you’re looking for a good comeback, or just need a cathartic laugh, the skit delivers on both counts.

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