Aside from the occasional rogue contrarian—or the clandestine panoply of mole people disguised as America's steel workers—pretty much everybody with a mouth likes pizza, right? It's arguably one of the simplest foods out there, but when made correctly, it can rival the beauty and taste of even the most luxurious of dishes.
Alas, even glorious pizza faces situations in which its cheesy, Rubenesque curves are unwelcome. Say for instance, you are a single mother, desperately seeking alimony from your ex-husband—only to receive ungodly amounts of pizza in return.
A court in the Northern Italian city of Padua has ruled in favor of a divorced father who was taken to court for paying alimony to his ex-wife exclusively in the form of pizza. The judge ruled that pizza-as-alimony was just fine.
Did we forget to mention that the man just so happens to make pizza for a living?
The 50-year-old pizza maker in question—named only "NT" in local news reports—was required as part of a divorce settlement to make a monthly payment of €300 ($333.99 USD) in child support to his ex-wife. Being the industrious pizza maker he is, NT thought it was only fair that he should be allowed to pay said alimony with his edible wares. This was an idea his ex-wife wholly rejected, and eventually took him to court over.
Unfortunately for both the mother and child, Judge Chiara Bitozzi ruled in favor of the father and found him not guilty of non-payment of child support. In the ruling, the judge stated that the pizza maker did not earn enough money to make full payments in actual cash, and as such, it was totally acceptable for him to pay for the alimony entirely in pizza.
There's no word on what type of pizza the man was giving as part of the monthly payments, although it seems he might have thrown in a focaccia or two as well.
Pizza is a damn beautiful thing. Hell, some would go so far as to call it the unabashed sovereign of the food world, but it's no substitute for money. Too bad it takes a hell of a lot more than an unending stream of pizza for a mother to raise her child.