Ronaldo Likes Doing Normal Things But He’s Afraid Of Dying Young

Ah, Cristiano Ronaldo, where would we be without you? Your footballing adventures, not to mention your equally thrilling off-pitch existence, continue to enthrall us and fill more column inches than you can fit inside a pair of well-appointed CR7 briefs. Let us bask in the warm glowing glowing warmth that is your success for many years to come.

And let us also learn more about you, Cristiano the man as well as the footballer. In an interview conducted to help promote the new Nike Tech Pack collection, CR7 provided some insightful answers. Let's take a look at them, shall we?

A normal person. I try to do normal stuff, surrounded by my family, my friends, my son. Just trying to be as normal as possible. I'm just training in the morning, so when I arrive home I get to do other things that make me feel comfortable.

Let's recap on some of CR7's recent escapades: bought his agent a Greek island as a wedding gift; found a mobile phone that just happened to belong to an attractive girl and then partied with said girl and her attractive friends in a Las Vegas hotel room; dressed up as a homeless dude to fool the good people of Madrid; reportedly spent £12m on the New York apartment which inspired 50 Shades of Grey. Yep, nothing out of the ordinary there. Just the most mundane 'normal person' stuff we all get up.

What is your biggest passion outside of football?

I have many, but I will just mention one, which is playing with my kid.

That's nice. Obviously we think that's nice. C'mon, we're not monsters.

You're widely considered to be the best football player on the planet. What keeps you motivated if you're already at the pinnacle of the sport?

Well, my challenge is always, year-to-year, trying to be the best—training hard to get myself 100% all the time. My main goal is to always achieve this kind of success. This is what I am trying to do all of the time, and the last eight, nine, ten years I think have gone pretty well. So I try to keep going like that.

Okay, this time it's the question we've got to take to task. Ronaldo is widely considered to be one of the two best footballers on the planet. There is absolutely no consensus that he alone is the best. So yeah, we didn't read the response.

What is your biggest fear?

Dying young. I don't want to die young. I want to be old and die when I'm 80 or 90.

This response is actually quite creepy. A legitimate answer would have been death itself, because that is scary, but the idea of dying young is a weird, abstract thing that only a certain type of character could be afraid of. Also, how is 90-year-old Cristiano going to cope when time has ravaged his once youthful looks? Surely that is an even more terrifying thought. In truth, this raises more questions than it answers.

What are you thinking in the moment right before you take the pitch for a match?

Nothing special. I try to enjoy it. Playing football is what I like to do. So I just enjoy it, the sport, and I want to allow the fans and the public to enjoy it, too.

"Must be better than Messi, must be better than Messi, man my hair looks beautiful, must be better than Messi."