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Music by VICE

We Got a 16-Year-Old to Review the First Avalanches Album In 16 Years

“Have people been waiting 16 years to listen to songs about cereal?”

by Sam Bryant
Jun 30 2016, 8:34pm

Image: Ashley Goodall

I was born in 2000. It was the year of the dragon and the last year my football team Melbourne were in an AFL Grand Final. It was also when The Avalanches released their last album Since I Left You.

My Dad has played me the album a few times and I’ve seen that video where the two guys are dancing. It sounds OK. I like hip-hop better.

Apparently their new record Wildflower is special because it took ages to come out. The guys at Noisey asked me to review it. I wanted to review the new Kanye West album but it’s not out yet.

The album art is kind of boring. It doesn’t really make me want to listen to it. It would be better if the Avalanches were on it. I don’t even know what they look like. Maybe they are like Daft Punk?

There’s a lot of songs on the album but some aren’t that long. The album goes for just under an hour.

Here is my review. I hope you like it.

The Leaves Were Falling
This sounds like background noise.

Because I’m Me
At the start it sounds like some kid singing out of tune about wearing shoes. It kind of sounds quiet and weird but then it gets louder like when you haven’t put your headphones into your computer properly and then you do and it gets clear. Then there is a hip-hop guy singing and then the out of tune kid comes back.

Frankie Sinatra
This is the song from that video and it has Danny Brown on it. I really like Danny Brown. At the start it sounds old-fashioned music and then it gets better when Danny Brown starts rapping. The old-fashioned music gets annoying at the end.

Subways
This song is really cool and one of my favourites. I’d heard it on triple j before the album came out. It’s kind of dreamy.

Going Home
This sounds like the Bee Gees.

If I Was a Folkstar
This is a relaxing song. It gets better when the singing comes in. I like it when it goes “ahh, ahh, ahhh”. My Dad says that this is his favourite song. But my Dad usually likes really boring music like Tame Impala.

Colours
Another song with weird bits of singing. Some of the songs sound like they are skipping. It can get annoying

Zap!
It sounds like a Western movie and then it sounds like someone is speeding through the radio settings.

The Noisy Eater
Is this song about this website? It sounds like a cartoon. My Dad tells me that the hip-hop guy is Biz Markie or something and he’s talking about cereal. This is my second favourite song on the album.

Wildflower
Wildflower is also the album name but this song is about cereal too I think. A lot of the songs are about cereal. Have people been waiting 16 years to listen to songs about cereal?

Harmony
This is another song with a hip-hop guy. I like the songs with words better than the sample songs.

Image: Steve Gullick

Live a Lifetime Love
I think this is another Danny Brown song. This is my third favourite song. Can we actually skip the next two songs?

Park Music

Livin Underwater (Is Something Wild)

The Wozard of ID
I thought this song may have a spelling mistake in the name. More Danny Brown which means it’s good.

Over the Turnstiles
This is really short which is cool because I’m kind of getting bored of this now.

Sunshine
It sounds like Michael Jackson but Michael Jackson is dead but maybe this was recorded before he died! It would be spooky if really was Michael Jackson.

Light Up
Is this song about smoking weed? Do you think the Avalanches smoke weed?

Kaleidoscopic Lovers
The guy singing this song sounds like a hippie. It sounds like something that my friend Bryce would be into. When we go skating he only listens to hippie music.

Stepkids
It’s getting a bit chat now.

Saturday Night Inside Out
Last song! Pretty good record but I reckon my Dad liked it more than I did but that's not surprising as he has been talking about it for ages.

The Avalanches – Wildflower out July 8, available to stream exclusively on Apple Music from July 1.