I Punched Danzig In The Face
And knocked him the fuck out.
As anybody who has ever tried to listen to the Misfits on Youtube knows, the ubiquitous commenter debate over whether Glenn Danzig or Michael Graves was the better frontman (sorry, Jerry Only!) is dominated by scarily overzealous Danzig fans who seem like the kind of people who would sob uncontrollably and stomp their feet if you called Danzig a pussy to their faces. Naturally, a few years ago when those same fans witnessed their idol being floored, they took to forums and comment boxes to call the puncher, Danny Marianino, and his band, North Side Kings, fags and fabricate scenarios where their hero somehow comes out on top, like an invincible, metal antichrist, rather than a diva who's probably had a slap coming his way for a while.
Meanwhile, Danzig himself claimed that he didn’t punch Marianino back because there was a camera rolling and he didn’t want a million-dollar lawsuit on his hands, as opposed to the fact he was knocked out cold on the floor.
Danny, hanging out in a pool.
What Danzig’s fans lack in grammar and sense of perspective, they have made up for with blind rage and empty threats of a grisly revenge, which Danzig will probably tart up and use as lyrics to a song at some point. Here’s a couple of examples of the kind of thing they were saying:
"Listen you fagest. I will kill you if you ever cross path with me. You will die motherfucker don't even think boogieman I am."
"NORTH SIDE KINGS AND THEIR FANS ARE PUSSIES! DO YOU HEAR ME NORTH SIDE KINGS BITCHES THAT HIDE AND RUN FOR COVER? COME TRY ME LIKE BITCH AND I WILL GUT YOU. GLENN DANZIG WILL ALWAYS BE BETTER THAN YOU, EVEN ON HIS WORSE DAY COMPARED TO YOUR BEST. PUSS ASS COWARDS. KEEP LOOKING IN THE MIRROR AND KNOW THAT YOU ARE WEAK AND DANZIG AND THEIR FANS PISS ON YOUR MOTHERFUCKING FACE WITH SUCCESS WHILE YOU HAVE NOTHING BECAUSE YOU DESERVE NOTHING AT ALL YOU FUCKTARD NON METAL BITCH ASS PUSSIES. GET SOME!!"
Danny Marianino, the man behind the fist, is releasing a book about all the hate he’s received, so I called him up to talk about what it’s like to be on the receiving end a tonne of misspelled vitriol from people with names like BeerSlayer863 and Lucifuge.
VICE: Hey, Danny. So, I have to ask the obvious question; how come you ended up punching Glenn Danzig?
Danny Marianino: He was upset that we ate his catering, specifically his French Onion Soup. He was pouting about it all day because it's hard to get your hands on such a delicious item in a middle-of-nowhere high school gymnasium. His manicurist was supposed to fly out from LA to paint his nails and bring his leather pants he left at the dry cleaners, too, but he got held up looking at kittens to adopt at a pet shop. I was concerned about his wellbeing, so I asked him if I could help with his nails. He bugged out, the rest is history.
Haha – very good. But really, why did you end up punching Glenn Danzig?
The show fell behind due to the promoter being disorganised. Glenn refused to push his time back and we, along with three other bands, were forced to play after him on the condition that he announced the other bands. He didn't announce the bands and closed the show, so we all got fucked over. I went to talk to him. He started yelling, so did I, then he put his hands on me. He pushed me into a wall and yelled “Fuck you motherfucker!” I defended myself.
What happens when the camera stops rolling?
He got dragged out and I was stuck answering questions with the cops because he tried to press charges on me for assault. Eventually they ask me if I wanted to press charges and I said no. We packed up and left an hour later.
What was the fallout like?
Imagine every time that you see your name or band online, some jerkoff loser has called you fat or gay, or said that your band sucks. The comments were hateful, mean and surprisingly really homophobic, but so stupid it makes it funny. Hopefully this book raises more awareness towards internet bullying.
Cyber bullying is becoming a much bigger deal, but not normally with guys in hardcore bands.
Yeah. When you see these kids like Amanda Todd killing themselves, you think; 'Thank goodness I'm a grown man and not a teenager dealing with this shit.'
How much of this stuff did you get?
I had over 150 emails and messages saved before the book, but there were billions of comments online. It’s rough looking up North Side Kings online and seeing all that.
Have you ever had anyone giving you grief about it in real life?
I've had a few people argue with me about it, yeah, but after talking we normally start buying each other drinks.
That’s nice. I have to say, though, North Side Kings were a very macho band. You called your style “thug-core”, so isn’t it a bit rich to complain about cyber-bullying?
Sure, NSK was bit macho. I never claimed to be a tough guy, though. I always remained humble and said fighting sucks and that I was lucky not to get beaten up. Unlike Danzig, North Side Kings never charged photographers at a festival, threw kids out of signings because of beef with an old band, kicked a girl in the face from the stage or shot videos about how we are black belts and can kick anyone’s ass.
Haha. One thing I found funny about the online comments is how so many Danzig fans have speculated about what happens when the camera stops and make up scenarios where Danzig somehow kicks your ass later. Why do you think people prefer to believe Danzig came out on top?
I think it is hard to accept anything discouraging from someone you look up to. Look at that singer chick, Rihanna – she's back together with Chris Brown. Clearly she loves the guy, but come on; he turned her into a raccoon and publicly humiliated her. She sees a different Chris Brown than you and I see. People get clouded. They believe their idol can do no wrong, but let’s face it; we are all human and make mistakes. No one is invincible.
Did punching Glenn Danzig make it difficult for you to play music? I can imagine certain venues having a bit of a problem booking you.
I don’t really do much in the way of music now, anyway. That was part of the reason when it came to touring, though, yeah. Not that we can’t hold our own, but like Danny Glover says in the Lethal Weapon movies, “I’m too old for this shit." I moved in a different direction and now my life totally rules.
Good for you. When’s the book out?
It should be on Amazon at the end of November.
Keep up with progress on Danny’s book, Don’t Ever Punch a Rockstar; A Collection of Hate Mail and Other Crazy Rumours on his Facebook group.