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Music by VICE

This Modern Love: Darwin Deez

We make DD fill out our dating questionnaire, plus here's the premiere of "Bag of Tricks."

by Kim Taylor Bennett
Sep 14 2015, 12:19pm


Darwin Deez shot by Schlueter

Delightful Darwin Deez has given us another sweet tune to share, which is lifted from his new LP, Double Down, out at the end of this week.

According to Deez the track was "inspired by Kelis and Andre 3000's 'Millionaire' as I have loved and revered that song for a long time and here I decided to go for broke. The sad uptempo."

We are feeling that. "Millionaire" is for sure one of Kelis's best tunes and the happy-sad tempo is always the pop music sweet-spot. As for "Bag of Tricks" (hey, everyone's got one), it's a pretty damning indictment of person's behavior set to a shimmy and a noodling bassline: "I'm concerned about your health and the way you prostitute yourself." Yikes. That person is a man, FYI.

Have a listen below. Plus we make the singer fill out our Ok Cupid-cribbed questionnaire where we find out about the 31-year-old's experiences with early days cybersex and the fact that he still uses a Blackberry—dang, throwback! Also, there's some fairly revealing information about a vacuum cleaner which actually made us gasp. And love him even more for his triple x honesty!

Age/Sex/Location: 31/Male/NYC.

My aim screen name was darwin84, but before that I used to go to an anti-Hanson chatroom everyday after school—grade 7 or so. My screen name in there was holmes. met a girl in there eventually, we private chatted everyday, her screen name was darkangel, she was a girl named, um…shit… Lisette from Michigan. Can almost remember the city name. She snail mailed me a photo of herself once. Then one day we had cybersexand never spoke again. The kind of primitive cybersex where you just type a bunch of dirty stuff that you claim to be doing, not the modern version where you masturbate together on video chat. I’m still not sure if it was her that day or what.

My self-summary:
High hopes, clean system. Self-centered but aware of your feelings. Maybe better at pretending to care than actually caring. Deeply afraid of life. Blackberry user.

What I’m doing with my life: I am making rock songs, living in NYC.

I’m really good at: Talking about my feelings, talking to you about your feelings, writing bridges, playing Android Netrunner: The Card Game, not showering, not washing my hair, remaining ridiculously thin while eating wild amounts of food.

The first things people usually notice about me are: I’m tall (6’3”) and that I’ve forgotten your name.

Continued below.

Favorite books:
Discourses by Meher Baba. Beyond Good and Evil by Nietzsche. Non-Violent Communication by Marshall Rosenberg. I like non-fiction only. Fiction has too many details for me, I’m ADD.

Favorite movies:

The Matrix, American Movie, The Room, Run Lola Run, Safe Men (stars Sam Rockwell and Paul Giamatti, was made by the Zoolander guy before Zoolander—find it, it’s like a funnier Bottle Rocket), Dancer in the Dark, Being John Malkovich. All of those except the Room are from the year 2000.

Favorite music:
The Dismemberment Plan, Michael Jackson, Io - the demo EP,

Favorite TV shows:
Seinfeld, Dawson’s Creek, Star Trek: The Next Generation, The Wonder Years, Rick and Morty, Check it Out with Dr. Steve Brule.

Favorite Food: Thai curry, red or green.

Six things I could never do without:
Walking, fish oil, plectrums, eggs, the freedom to create things, analysis.

The most private thing I’m willing to admit is:
I used a vacuum cleaner on myself a few times as a teenager, from which I have a tiny bruise-like discoloration on my penis.

On a typical Friday night I am:
At home on my computer eating take out. Which only feels pathetic after I’ve done it three Fridays in a row. Tour destroys your social life, man. Nobody thinks you’re in town, ever.

You should message me if:
You can help me remember the name of this one cool four-player space themed arcade game I played at Take Ten arcade in University Mall in Chapel Hill, NC on my birthday in 1994.

Darwin Deez Tour Dates

11/17/15 Cleveland, OH @ Beachland Tavern *

11/18/15 Detroit, MI @ Pike Room *

11/19/15 Chicago, IL @ Beat Kitchen *

11/21/15 Denver, CO @ Larimer Lounge

11/22/15 Salt Lake City, UT @ Urban Lounge

11/24/15 San Francisco, CA @ Rickshaw *

11/25/15 Los Angeles, CA Bootleg Theater *

11/27/15 San Diego, CA @ Voodoo Room at House of Blues *

11/28/15 Phoenix, AZ @ Valley Bar *

11/30/15 Austin, TX @ Red 7 Small *

12/1/15 Houston, TX @ Fitzgerald’s Downstairs *

12/2/15 Dallas, TX @ Three Links *

12/6/15 Philadelphia, PA @ Boot & Saddle*

12/7/15 Boston, MA @ Great Scott *

12/8/15 Brooklyn, NY @ Rough Trade *

12/9/15 Washington, D.C. @ Black Cat *

12/11/15 Buffalo, NY @ Studio at Waiting Room *

12/12/15 Toronto, CAN @ Drake Hotel *

12/13/15 Rochester, NY @ Bug Jar *

* Supported by Charly Bliss

Double Down is out on 9.18 via Lucky Number.