My Drug of Choice Is This Video of an Opossum Family in Some Lady's Grill

No better thing exists on the internet.

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May 6 2019, 9:15pm

When it comes to surfing the World Wide Web, we are all faced with thousands upon thousands of choices every single day as to what we'd like to visit, click, watch, share, or scroll past, and yet while we are each exposed to seven bajillion (rough estimate) Online Things with every waking hour, almost none of them genuinely offer us the pleasure equivalent of, say, a small plate of rigatoni in vodka sauce—no matter how many likey-hearts or LOLs we dispense.

However, while the endless feeds of content gruel are slowly giving each and everyone one of us societally terminal levels of ADD, there are occasional bright patches in our daily crawl through the internet jungle. Once in a blue moon, we find ourselves genuinely enjoying some grainy picture of a crab smoking a cigarette or whatever in ways we cannot explain even to ourselves.

Speaking to this phenomenon, we would like to share with you this 18-second video.

The premise: Some lady named Cat Cozzi has noticed an opossum (the North American variety of the marsupials do, in fact, have the 'o') living in the grill on her patio.

The timely element: The opossum has had babies.

The content: Cozzi pays a visit to the thriving, cozy opossum family, politely knocking on the barbecue-fork drawer that they have made their home with a set of tongs before gently sliding it open to reveal the beady-eyed brethren.

There are some questions that remain unanswered (i.e., how do you discover that there's an opossum in a drawer in your grill when it's not even barbecue season yet?), but for now, please just let us enjoy this brief clip that spans our appreciation of absurdity, good manners, baby animals, and an iconic facial expression that could rival that of the ORLY owl (the dopey, blank, vaguely threatened grin seen on Mama Opossum).

We declare this Online Thing blessed. *slams gavel*