What Will Happen to the Mating Geckos Lost in Space?

Last Saturday, a Russian research satellite bearing five geckos, a fruit fly colony, and some choice mushrooms was launched from Baikonur Cosmodrome. Today, Roscosmos officials confirmed rumors that their Foton-M4 spacecraft is no longer responding to mission commands, leaving the animals stranded in Low Earth Orbit.

"The equipment […] is working in automatic mode, and in particular the experiment with the geckos is working according to the programme," said Oleg Voloshin of the Institute of Medico-Biological Problems, the group that organized the experiment.

But though the orbiter’s life-support systems may be holding steady (for now), ground control has been unable to get the satellite to reach the planned permanent orbit, at a higher altitude. That will throw the geckos off-course for their landing, slated to take place in about two months.

The Foton-M4 is the first of a new line of microgravity research satellites, designed to test biological responses to space environments. This inaugural satellite carries one male gecko and four females. Researchers hoped the quintet would have lots of sex during their two-month stay in orbit, providing insight into reproductive success in microgravity.

But sadly, the gecko space-orgy is shaping up to be short-lived. Even if the life-support systems continue to hold out—which is a big “if”—the uncommunicative satellite needs to return to its planned flight path or it will be “lost,” according to The Moscow Times. Whether that means it will burn up in the atmosphere or orbit indefinitely hasn’t been specified, but neither outcome looks good for the geckos.

Foton-M4 is only the latest glitch in a long tradition of accidental death traps devised by the Russian space program. Most recently, the Bion-M satellite, launched on April 19, 2013, delivered 45 mice, 15 geckos, and eight gerbils into orbit for a one-month research period.

Though the satellite pulled off a perfect landing, it was too late to save the majority of the Bion-M’s inhabitants. Thirty-nine of the mice starved to death after the food supply system malfunctioned (which makes you wonder what the remaining six had to do to survive—now, that would make for a superbly dark Disney movie).

Meanwhile, all eight gerbils were killed when their food, oxygen, ventilation, and light systems simultaneously turned off. On the bright side, all 15 geckos returned safely to Earth … long enough to be euthanized.

Despite the enormous animal casualties on Bion-M, the mission’s officials proclaimed it a success, emphasizing that they had expected many of the animals to perish in space.

No doubt valuable information is indeed gleaned from these projects, but you can’t help but feel a little sad for the unwitting crews of spacecraft like Foton-M4. Though, it must be said: There are worse ways to go than in a five-way sex party in space.