Happy Valentine's Day: Here are The Sexiest Ska Punk Songs

Roses are red, Ska Punk is money, or something like that, whatever 420.

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Feb 14 2017, 5:09pm

This article originally appeared on Noisey Canada. 

Valentine's Day is today, and nothing is more romantic than putting on some flood pants and skanking—ska dancing—in the pit. Ska punk is the music of lovers. Third wave ska punk provides a rhythm for tenderness through upbeat strumming and horns. Ska is also about having fun, smoking weed, and getting dreads—mid 2000s white guys know! This lifestyle is the epitome of sensuality, which is why we put together a list of the sexiest ska songs for your sexy Valentine's Day 'sextivities.'

Some of you might be single. Maybe you've been recently burned by a partner or you are simply unlovable. That's fine. Ska is not only music for loving others, it is music for self-love. As a philosopher once said, "Here I am, doing everything I can, holding onto what I am, pretending I'm a super man." That philosopher is the California ska collective known as Goldfinger, and those words are about chillaxing, wearing Chuck Taylors and a backpack covered in anarchy badges. Ska punk is all about self-care. Sure, you could run out to the store to get flowers and chocolates for someone care about. Maybe in that lame scenario you shower and dress yourself like a human being, but that's just not the ska punk way, dudes. Fire up the bong and get ready to skank. Below is a list of ska music to ensure you feel the love on Valentine's Day.

Reel Big Fish - "Take On Me"

Reel Big Fish offers a more intellectual kind of love. Like art gallery patrons might appreciate the Impressionistic strokes of a Monet or the intimacy of Michelangelo's "Pieta" captured in carved marble, Reel Big Fish is also very dope. "Take On Me" describes an existential struggle after a dalliance between two companions. The plea, "Take on me, take me home" speaks to feelings of longing. "I'll be coming for your love," the balladeer opines. Plus, there is a sick guitar solo during the breakdown to get you hot and bothered.

Mad Caddies - "Riot"

I have to put all my cards on the table here: Mad Caddies are the best ska punk band of my youth, and now they will be the best ska punk band of your Valentine's Day. The song "Riot" is a passionate romp. You might listen to the lyrics and think it's a protest jam rebelling against a president who "can't even read" and an empire "crumbling down." You'd be right to think that because those are the words of the song. But when Chuck Robertson sings "greed of the nations will burn to the ground," I think he also means stuff about giving someone special affection or whatever. 4/20.

Sublime - "Burritos"

Sometimes ska punk songs are about the love of ska punk, the purest kind of love. The late Bradley Nowell of Sublime put it best:

"I don't want to watch no porno
and I don't want to play guitar
I don't want to spank the monkey
I don't want to go down to the corner bar"

While the song "Burritos" seems to be a tune about doing nothing, the chorus underscores that true happiness comes from the enjoyment of ska punk. "Keep on skankin' Ronnie,
skank the night away," goes the chorus. Ronnie is our hearts and our hearts are set to skank mode. Tell someone special you want to skank with them.

The Mighty Mighty Bosstones - "The Impression That I Get"

"The Impression That I Get" is the perfect song for walking down the aisle to marry someone or to welcome a newborn child into the world. I'm not entirely sure what this song is about, to be totally honest. In fact, I've never had to knock on wood. But I know someone who has. And I love you.

Less Than Jake - "Dopeman"

Haha, smoke weed. This song rules... and is also about love. Yeah. Yeah... I'm so empty inside

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