Prepare to Be Horrified by Dale Earnhardt Jr.'s Favorite Sandwich

Whether we're talking about burgers sandwiched in a bun made of ramen or mass hysteria brought about by Korean honey butter chips, we've all been witness to the unmitigated ability of a single recipe to change the world forever.

This is a truth of which Dale Earnhardt Jr. has undoubtedly just become aware. He may be best known and beloved as a NASCAR driver, but his eating habits have set the world ablaze with a grim revelation—one that makes the Panama Papers look like a mere blip on the radar of humanity.

On Twitter this week, Earnhardt shared what he says is his favorite sandwich: a banana and mayo combo on white bread. The internet pretty much collectively threw up, hard.

Making my favorite sandwich. I swear it's delicious. @Hellmanns pic.twitter.com/sK5XeHxVi9

— Dale Earnhardt Jr. (@DaleJr) April 5, 2016

What could be so bad, we wondered? Everyone accepts Elvis's fave—the banana, bacon, and peanut butter sandwich; many even love it. The problem with Earnhardt's sandwich of choice must come down to the mayo. It's as if an ambrosia salad had a boozy bender of a weekend at a Wonder Bread factory and this abomination is the sad excuse for the scion that resulted.

Maybe it's a Southern thing, but good gracious! Call us slow as molasses, but we do believe we have developed a case of the vapors thanks to this here folderol!

After a quick visit to our local apothecary for some revitalizing smelling salts, we got to thinking: Could this monstrosity of a sandwich actually be a thing that people, aside from Earnhardt, actually consume?

Apparently so.

A Facebook page promoting the wonders of the banana-and-mayo sandwich predates the Earnhardt tweet. That being said, fans of that page are pretty excited about the brouhaha surrounding the famous race car driver's pronouncement.

@James_Dator Usually see it also with peanut butter. It's pretty good. — Violence (@PhilKenSaban) April 5, 2016

But most people out there are pretty disgusted by the whole thing.

@DaleJr @Hellmanns pic.twitter.com/1nEiJUiKya

— Jet Li Harvey Oswald (@MylesHi) April 5, 2016

.@DaleJr @Hellmanns pic.twitter.com/k9wpXBKmGn — Dieter Kurtenbach (@dkurtenbach) April 5, 2016

What's more bizarre? The sandwich or the reaction to the sandwich? Insane! @Hellmanns lovin it tho. @MorningExp @CoyWire @RobinMeade

— Dale Earnhardt Jr. (@DaleJr) April 6, 2016

Hellmann's mayo—tagged in the original tweet—must be very pleased at all the free publicity. (Unless they're paying for the whole thing.) We also have a feeling that Duke's mayo, a Southern favorite, is not thrilled. On its website, Duke's actually references NASCAR as being—along with their own mayo—a thing that defines the South. Duke's has also been known to sponsor NASCAR vehicles.

Thanks @Hellmanns. Interesting recipe. I'm curious. pic.twitter.com/GWkb6lbMRe — Dale Earnhardt Jr. (@DaleJr) October 10, 2014

But Earnhardt is sticking with his choice. He even tweeted a follow-up that suggests naysayers should go the Elvis route: add peanut butter and fry the sucker.

.@ElvisPresley ate em like this. But fried. @wjs45 pic.twitter.com/3ZAkKORId6

— Dale Earnhardt Jr. (@DaleJr) April 5, 2016

We're still not entirely convinced this whole debacle wasn't the work of some clandestine organization created solely for the advancement of bananas and mayo. That being said, we wholeheartedly support the consumption of sandwiches regardless of their blasphemous contents.

Shine on, Earnhardt, you kooky, crazy diamond.