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Music

Welp... Michael Bublé is Hosting The Brit Awards 2017

After pledging to be more diverse​ in their celebration of Britain and its culture, they've chosen a man who resembles a christmas decoration both in name and basicness.
Emma Garland
London, GB

Here is a fun fact and news item of the day: The Brit Awards 2017, the event in which the music of Britain is showcased to the world, is going to be presented by Michael Bublé​​. Let that sink in for a moment.

Michael Bublé​, whose key demographic is between the ages of 45 and the grave​. ​​Michael Bublé​, who is typically only summoned once per year, at Christmas, via the medium of your nan's CD player. Michael Bublé​, who I'm assuming most young people don't know a single thing about beyond that joke where you mispronounce his surname "bubbly" to the amusement of nobody. In a year where it has become crucial for the organisers pull their finger out and represent the broad spectrum of Britain and its culture, this is the man who will be presenting our country's finest award ceremony.

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This choice feels random at best, if not at direct odds with the academy's promises to broaden their horizons after receiving backlash this year for ignoring black British music. It's difficult not to roll your eyes at the fact that after pledging to be more diverse​ in their celebration of Britain, the first thing they did was hire a Canadian entertainer whose only difference in profile to the winner's everybody complained about last year is that he isn't popular with young people.

That said, Michael Bublé​'s job is to entertain, and entertain he certainly does. Just a few weeks ago, for example, he thrilled everyone at theRoundhouse by saying "shit" a lot and tossing aroundsome banter about his coat. So…. maybe it'll be fine? In many ways Michael Bublé​ is the ideal candidate. He has already won over half the nation by being exactly the kind of person you could take home to your parents for a roast and end up having to pry him from the passionate vice grip of your dad's embrace so you can leave. If he repeated James Corden's script from 2014, nobody would notice, such is the gravity of his charisma. In fact, they would laugh; fall off the couch, creased with delight, as Michael Bublé​​ - with that soft accent and sexy twinkle in his eye - delivers that same unfortunate line about Harry Styles' arsehole.

The bottom line though is that they have chosen Michael Bublé​ for the same reason you allow him to soundtrack your festive season: because it's the only thing the entire family can tolerate without getting into an argument. He is inoffensive with the added bonus of being really good looking. He's like the James Bond of cover songs. So safe of a bet is young Bublé​ that, if you go by what The Brits have traditionally held up as a UK music industry standard, he's probably about as British as you can get.

Follow Emma on Twitter​.

​Photo courtesy of The Brits.