Composite by VICE Staff
Dabbling downstairs with your fingertips may be the au natural way to third base, but adding a sex toy to your erotic treasure chest doesn’t hurt. It’s time to slide the edible undies to the side and make room for bigger and better things. Not that undergarments that taste like Fruit Roll-Ups don’t deserve a standing ovation, but will they make you cum? Our verdict says no, which is why we stan this cult-fave clitoral vibrator that will make you orgasm no problem: the Satisfyer Pro 2. Besides taking you to O-Town and being the best-selling vibrator for VICE readers (!!!), it’s currently 25% off for Labor Day, which is its steepest discount in 30 days, according to Amazon. The iconic Satisfyer Pro 2 uses air-pulse stimulation to radiate feelings of suction and pulsations similar to oral sex on le bean, and comes in three different colorways—including an icy blue, lavender, and rose pink. Its 11 different pulsing intensities should make it no problem to find one that satisfies your (highly) personal preferences. Different strokes for different folks, but the silicone head is big enough to surround the entire clitoris, gentle enough for even the lightest touch, and powerful enough to throttle you into orgasmic space, so we have high hopes. One of our writers claimed it will have her “yodeling for many spank sessions to come,” which has made us already put in our orders. With a 4.2-star average and over 59,000 reviews on Amazon, that statement holds truth for a whole lot of happy buyers. “The bad thing about this device is the fact that you may have a heart attack using this because it will blow your MIND!!!!,” one reviewer emphatically exclaimed. The motor on the Pro 2 is also stronger than its previous model, all while being quieter for a lovely, discreet night in even if you’re dealing with roommates the next room over (or worse yet, parents). It’s also rechargeable and waterproof, so feel free to bring it in the shower for some ~*water fun*~. The Satisfyer Pro 2’s 25% off discount might poof away before your clit-sucking dreams can be fulfilled, so equip yourself with this truly perfect suction vibrator while the opportunity is there. The Satisfyer Pro 2 is available on sale on Amazon.
The Rec Room staff independently selected all of the stuff featured in this story. Want more reviews, recommendations, and red-hot deals? Sign up for our newsletter.
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The Rec Room staff independently selected all of the stuff featured in this story. Want more reviews, recommendations, and red-hot deals? Sign up for our newsletter.