Carlos Tevez, Marcio Valverde and Martin Boyle: Vice Sports UK's Goals Of The Week

What is there after this life? It's a question that has troubled the human mind for millennia. While the majority of world religions suggest that existence continues in one way or another after our physical form expires, atheistic thought promises us an endless expanse of black nothingness – an unfathomable, godless infinity.

Strangely, though, very few people adhere to the idea that death is just an eternity of football highlights. It makes as much practical sense as the other options, when you think about it. Goal after goal, slamming into the back of the net of existence. Let's prepare ourselves for that possibility, then, by watching the three best goals from the past week.

The Premier League misses Carlos Tevez, it really does. Always somehow underrated – despite the incontrovertible evidence that he was, in fact, absolutely lethal – his departure from Manchester City to Juventus in the summer of 2013 was a sad day for English football.

Now back at first club Boca Juniors, he certainly hasn't lost his ruthless streak. At 32 years of age, he can still sprint from his own half, beat an entire back four and slot home from an acute angle. Just ask his latest Copa Libertadores opponents, Club Bolivar.

We're not in the habit of watching Peruvian football, to be honest. As domestic action in South America goes, Peru's Primera División probably isn't the most prestigious league out there.

Still, that doesn't mean it can't produce the odd screamer every now and then. Take this absolute madness from Marcio Valverde, for instance. He initiated Real Garcilaso's 5-2 rout of César Vallejo this Wednesday with a thumping lob from almost 60 yards. It ain't no thang.

If you think Peruvian football is niche, just imagine watching the Scottish Championship. With all the individual quality of a Wall's banger, with all the aesthetic merit of a 1960s council block, Scotland's second tier is anything but the go-to place for wondergoals.

Martin Boyle may have changed all that.

Okay, okay – one decent strike isn't going to overhaul the league's reputation for toe pokes and unspeakably bad tackling. Still, this isn't just any old goal. This is a legitimate, bona fide thunderfucker.

WATCH: The goals from last night are now on Hibs TV Freeview now, including Boyle's peachhttps://t.co/ovvZ7nPvNghttps://t.co/y3SzDVIwxt
— Hibernian FC (@HibsOfficial) April 6, 2016

Playing in Hibernian's much-needed win over Livingston on Tuesday evening, with the scores tied around the 80th minute mark, Boyle met a half clearance on the edge of the box with a belting shot. The time between his boot meeting the ball and the ball hurtling into the back of the net is minimal. Not a bad way to notch the winner, really.