Is there anything more frustrating than getting on the phone with a telecommunications provider? First, there’s the 30-minute wait while the same garbled yacht rock track loops in your ear, and then another 15 minutes of “Okay, now turn the router on and off again” before you might get a useful answer as to why your internet connection has been cutting in and out for two days, and—oh crap, the call dropped. Time to start all over again.
Burlington, Ontario man Jeremy Parsons had enough of this kind of treatment from his service provider—Bell Canada—and decided to exact revenge. In a video posted to Facebook on Monday, Parsons stands outside a Bell store dressed in a camo polo and holding an axe, with a Bell internet modem at his feet.
“Bell Canada, for a communications company, you are a failure,” Parsons says to the camera, explaining that he is unsatisfied with his internet service. He can’t easily get Bell representatives on the phone, he claims, nor does the company respond to his pleas on social media. When he did speak to a Bell representative, they give him wrong information, he claims, and a tech that was supposed to install a modem simply left it at his door.
“This is my version of a sales call for you, and this is what I think of your bloody service,” Parsons says, still holding the axe. Guess what happens next.
Parsons lifts the axe that until now was hanging nonchalantly by his side above his head and brings it down, again and again, smashing the ever-loving shit out of the Bell modem at his feet. “That’s it,” Parsons says once the deed is done. In a tone reminiscent of a backstage pro-wrestling taunt, he adds, “You suck!”
Speaking to Global News, Bell Canada spokesperson Nathan Gibson said that the company did all it could to help Parsons with his internet service: “Our tech support team has assisted Mr. Parsons on numerous occasions with questions about his internet service and have visited his residence several times to offer assistance.”
“We’ve tested the modem speed at Mr. Parsons’ home, and he is receiving the best service currently available in his area,” Gibson told Global News.
I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again—hating on telecoms is a treasured pastime in Canada, akin to a third national sport. Today, Jeremy Parsons is a real MVP.
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