Sometimes, as Americans, we lose sight of our identity. After all, what is it to be American? Perhaps America is a single father who left a life behind in his native land to create a better one for his son in New York City. Or it could be a nine year old girl in South Carolina who sees a female Senator speak at her school and is inspired to grow up to be a future leader herself. Or maybe America is something as simple as the sight of the morning sun as its beams glisten gently against the ever-flowing majesty of the Potomac River. These are all wrong, of course. America is definitely this gender reveal video of a motherfucking Dodge Ram pickup truck blasting pink exhaust out of its dual tailpipes set to Saliva’s “Click Click Boom.”
Allow me to set the scene, if I might assume such an honor: A dark, imposing truck sits parked on someone’s front lawn, the sun splashing elegantly against its passenger side. The edges of the shot are blurred, drawing our attention directly to the tail-end of the American-made beast. Perhaps on another day the truck’s mighty hitch would be festooned with a tasteful set of TruckNutz, but today, a day of familial celebration, it is adorned with a set of pink and blue balloons that sway gently in the breeze.
Along with off-camera onlookers, we the viewer watch for a moment, soundtracked by the sweet sounds of alternative rock band Saliva. As singer Josey Scott’s voice crescendos higher and higher through the song’s pre-chorus, we are tempted to close our eyes and let ourselves be overtaken by the strength of his angelic voice, which served the band well from 1996 until 2012, when he departed to pursue a career in Christian music. But the presence of the valiant Dodge, which stands like a bull ready to charge upon a matador, reminds us that our eyes are best left open.
Click! We are but two mere sands of time away from knowing the unborn child’s gender.
Click! The time grows closer by half.
Boom! The moment has arrived, and from underneath the powerful yet practical off-road vehicle we see two pink plumes of smoke triumphantly expel from the Ram’s exhaust pipes, announcing to the world that its owner shall soon be welcoming a female heir into the world and also that this truck gets surprisingly good gas mileage. Pink clouds resembling cotton candy soon envelope the truck as shrieks of excitement accompany another shout of Saliva’s “Click, click... boom!” It is beautiful, it is inspiring, it is America.
And yes, there are many, many videos out there which fuse the unbridled joy of expecting parents with the raw power of pickup trucks and muscle cars, but none of them harness the explosive dynamism of our country's citizen-chosen national anthem, “Click Click Boom.”
May God bless this child, and may God bless America.Thank you to Twitter user @very_tall_man for bringing this video into my life.