The holiday season is filled with fun festive family traditions like caroling, gift-giving, and reckless eating. But the grandest and most time-honored tradition of all is locking yourself in your childhood bedroom and numbing your brain with internet videos until your parents think you fell asleep and decide to leave you alone.
We get it. We'd spend the next 40 years locked in there if we could—safe, warm, surviving on a diet of Nesquick and Nutella. So to help that paralyzing fantasy come to life, we've collected some VICE video recommendations to help you through those desperate Christmas moments.
Mr. Cherry is a friendly Japanese comedian who breaks word records in hilarious ways. He currently holds 12. Plus, he's incredibly dexterous with his butt. If that doesn't make you want to watch this video nothing else we say will.
Your own student debt and lack of real job will appear pale in comparison to the glitter-filled lifestyle of London's resident unicorn revolutionaries. Watch on as former alcoholic Shaft, who identifies as a free loving unicorn, attempts to bring his "glampede" to the masses and establish a horny, sparkly, utopia.
This year you've probably been overwhelmed by waves of friends returning from Southeast Asian travel odysseys boring you with stories of German backpackers. When that becomes too much, come back to reality with some real talk about a monastery in Thailand running a unique methamphetamine rehab program that involves daily group vomiting sessions.
Reclusive Albanian tattoo artist and ex con Keq Marky likes to be alone. Spending time with people, he says, gives him headaches. Can you relate? Keq has cut himself off from the world and set up shop in one of Albania's abandoned military bunkers, which were formerly used as propaganda tools under communist rule.
Nothing says "hanging out in your teenage bedroom" like watching The X-Files. Why not make a day of it and catch up with the real life believers and skeptics who inspired the hit 90s show? This documentary follows Joe Nickell, a former magician and paranormal investigator who aims to expose the superstition and pseudoscience that typically surrounds alien sightings. But it's not all Dana Scully-style naysaying—there are interviews with a few truthers, too. It'll make you want to believe.
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