You Can Now Buy an Edward Snowden Action Figure
ThatsMyFace.com, the company behind the Julian Assange doll, is now peddling an Edward Snowden figure that is eerily lifelike. Surely, a Chelsea Manning toy isn't far behind.
This generation's version of GI Joe isn't a buff, rough, and tough army soldier—it's a meek, visually-impaired computer specialist. That's right, folks, the hottest new action figure in town is Edward Snowden.
Oregon-based company ThatsMyFace.com, which specialize in creating “3D sculptures” (a.k.a. dolls), is the creative mind behind the figurine. The product description says, “Introducing the Edward Snowden action figure. Edward Snowden's lifelike head mounted on a 12-inch fully-articulated action figure body with detailed pre-fitted clothes.” However, if you're looking to get multiple outfits for your Snowden, be prepared to pay an extra $25 to $60 for the already $99 toy. For the base rate of $99, Snowden is shipped to you wearing a basic “Military Brown” outfit. Can you say fashion suicide? Of course, if you dish out the extra bucks, you can get him wearing outfits like the “Indiana Jones” ($25), the “Casual” ($35), or the “Business Suit” ($60). Quite pricey yes, but ThatsMyFace.com adds that all proceeds go to the Freedom of the Press Foundation. Plus, they're made to order! Personally, I would go with the Indiana Jones, which, of course, comes with a whip and messenger bag.
Still too steep for your wallet? Well, you can skip getting any outfits and, in fact, skip even owning Snowden's body. For the price of only $60, you can purchase Snowden's head. What a deal! Make your own Snowden body out of popsicle sticks, glue his head to a Mr. Potato Head, or fit his head on a Ken doll's chiseled body. The possibilities are endless.
Previously, ThatsMyFace.com made a Julian Assange action figure. They also created the above video of Snowden and Assange hanging out, talkin' leaks, and blastin' some sick techno beats. Note: The tiny laptop Snowden is holding does not come with the “Casual” outfit, but you can custom order it.
I'll admit their ability to make Snowden's face so eerily lifelike is impressive. I assume this is difficult to do, takes a lot of time, and is probably why the toy costs so much money. This is the perfect gift for die-hard Snowden fans (Edheads? Snowboys and Snowgirls?). Use him in classic action figure fashion by playing with him on your carpet and making Snowden, along with his sidekick Mr. Laptop, save the world from the evil NSA, or you can make him a little more handy around the office and use him as a paperweight for your own private documents.
On the other hand, this can also be the perfect gift for die-hard Snowden haters. Dump your Snowden in the toilet as a form of water torture, put him in “jail” by stuffing him in a shoe box, or have him sit in a corner of the room wearing a tiny dunce cap that says “world's worst whistleblower.”
What you do with your Snowden figurine is purely up to you, but remember all proceeds go to the Freedom of the Press Foundation. According to Business Insider's Agence France Presse, the group is “a San Francisco-based non-profit that added Snowden—currently living in asylum in Russia—to its board of directors in January.”
Agence contacted the foundation, and they said they knew nothing about the action figure. “It's not us selling the dolls,” said Executive director Trevor Timm. “I'm actually not sure who is. The first time I saw anything about it was when someone tweeted about it, and no one has contacted us about it since, to my knowledge.” ThatsMyFace.com also provides this disclaimer on their site: “Edward Snowden and Freedom of the Press Foundation does not sponsor, authorize, or endorse this site or our Edward Snowden figure.”
Alison Stevenson is a stand-up comedian with a prodigious Barbie collection. See her and other VICE west coast contributors at ENTITLEMENT on Wednesday March 5 at Los Globos on Sunset Blvd. in Los Angeles. Follow her on Twitter @JustAboutGlad.