There's Only One Good Subway Sandwich and It's the Veggie Delite
Think of the Veggie Delite as a mediocre house salad served inside of a giant loaf of bread, and it delivers.
The Nine-Year-Old Paying Off His Classmates' Lunch Debt Isn't a 'Feel Good' Story
Framing these stories as inspirational pushes us further into a bleak future where debt is inescapable, even in elementary school.
You Can Never Have Enough Garlic, You Fools
A bad tweet from the New York Times has ignited the garlic-obsessed masses.
How to Make the Perfect Milkshake for Throwing at Fascists
Combining the public humiliation of racists and one of nature’s most delicious frosty treats is pure poetry in motion.
In Defense of Wedge Salads, from the Father of the Writer Who Denigrated Them
We received this unsolicited opinion piece from writer Sydney Mondry's dad and it deserves to be published on VICE.
Josh "Dad" Mondry
Actually, Wedge Salads Are an Abomination
Down with this vegetal doorstop.
Working at an Ice Cream Shop Is a Lowkey Nightmare
Some people do cry over spilled milk.
The Pain and Sorrow of Learning Your Beloved Childhood Pizza Is Trash
Quad Cities-style pizza rises to the level of legendarily terrible—like 'The Room' or the 'Troll 2' of bad pizza.
A Definitive Ranking of Almost Every Flavor of Mountain Dew
I did the Dew in 25 different incarnations to bring you this comprehensive guide to its many nuances.
Stop Calling Me a Monster Because I Bite My String Cheese
Doing away with the ridiculous ceremony of separating individual cheese fibers opens up a world of possibilities.
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Betty Crocker Rainbow Chip Frosting Is Best Enjoyed Straight Out of the Tub
After the Angry Internet Mob successfully demanded that Betty Crocker bring the stuff back from the dead, I knew I wasn't alone.
Actually, Tiny Overpriced Grocery Stores Are Perfect for Indecisive People
I look at the exorbitant prices as my penance for the inability to make a decision in bigger stores.