My Cat's Brush With Life-Saving Gender Reassignment Surgery
The doctors said that in order to save my cat's life, they would have to give him a vagina.
Having a Tibetan Sky Burial Means Birds Will Slowly Eat Your Corpse
Tibetan Buddhists have been performing sky burials for centuries, and it's one of the most economical—but also totally gory—funeral practices in the world.
Wait, Why Hasn't NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell Been Fired Yet?
On his watch, perception of the organization has gone from "bunch of guys with pink faces" to "hive of supervillainy." It's not that the NFL was ever a haven of good ethics; it just seems like he would have been scapegoated by now.
Looking at the Ancient Catholic Practice of Turning Human Bones into Art and Furniture
Sedlec Ossuary, a Roman Catholic chapel in the Czech Republic, purports to have one of every type of human bone in its collection of skeletons. In many cases, these bones were refashioned into art pieces or furniture pieces like chandeliers. We talked...
A Rigged Indian Casino Karaoke Contest Was the Low Point of My Life
I suddenly hoped that I hadn't gotten too drunk and fucked it all up in the name of protecting my vulnerabilities by shitting on strangers. After all, I was no better than them. I was there too. I did it because I wanted to.
Comedians Kyle Kinane and Chris Fairbanks Talk About Losing Their Virginity
Highlights include: a stripper buying gas station shoes, a college roommate sleeping through it, uttering the words "dick acne," dildo therapy, and so much more. A lot more, really.
Appropriating Team USA
Growing up, real football was for Americans and soccer was for people who spoke other languages while doing jobs with their hands. We've appropriated everything they owned, why not gentrify our own damn soccer team?
Why You Should Be Glad Eric Cantor Lost His Primary
Eric Cantor wasn't just some right-wing congressman. He allegedly had ties to corruption, stood in the way of tech funding because he didn't understand it, and was one of the architects of the government shutdown. It's good that he's fucking off.
My Dead Grandparents Make My Mom Win Big in Vegas
Two years ago my mother's mother, my baubie, suddenly passed away—and ever since, my mom’s been unstoppable at gambling. I’m a staunch atheist, and yet I'm pretty sure my dead grandparents have given my mom the power to win big in Vegas.
Children's Go-Kart Racing Is Decadent and Depraved
The Malibu Grand Prix is where weekend dads take their biological sons to kill just enough time to reassure themselves that they still have a say in their child’s development. However, each dead-eyed soul in that cavern knew no amount of air hockey...