Volume 12 Issue 8

Before we bust out the .50 caliber rifles and start shooting people from a mile away it's important to know exactly who we're talking about.

You are born miserable then you die.

Joey Dipollo came to our school to talk about AIDS. He was so cute.

Is there anything worse than having cool parents when you're growing up?

Having to give your father a paternity test sucks.

I cried and was afraid of dad for months.

The fact is, we did inherit the earth from our predecessors, and what a limp wristed, back sliding bunch of pussies they’re turning out to be.

It seems that UK electro-pop purveyor, Tom Vek, also has a unique angle on inter-generational relationships.

A lot of hippies came from families of privilege. When their little movement didn’t work out, they slowly reverted back to form but kept their decadent lifestyles.

Your grandparents are really cool, and you should be cool back to them.

At the funeral Karen is hurting so bad she decides to play the Stones on the church organ.

"I like to get all my designer stuff at TK Maxx. You can get all your designer stuff at a fraction of the price.”