We love to party not just because we love to forget about work or that essay due next week, but because we love the idea of going out and meeting people or the special someone who will be that lifelong optometrist who will take off your beer-goggles forever. Unfortunately with all the songs about shots (where the words are just like "shots!"), bad movies where some model is just a "normal looking guy," we all get a little lost along the way. Luckily we've rounded up a few of the more chaotic revelries, and with them a mathematically tested and statistically sound rating system informed by chaos theory itself, telling you exactly your chances of attracting a mate at each of the world’s best parties.
New Years in Reykjavík
Icelandic law says "no dice" on fireworks for 364 days of the year so what do you expect happens the one day these pyro-prohibited folk can get their hands on them? And what day is it they get to singe that Bjorkian sky? New Year's Eve! Aside from projectile explosives, huge bonfires are set up in every quarter of the city and Icelanders frolic around the flames until midnight when the bars open. Then everyone lets loose in a hail of drinking, hookups, and really long unpronounceable last names.Chances of finding true love: 7/10. Something primal happens to our faces in firelight that make us want to take to caves and mate. Plus, fireworks make everyone look badass.Rio de Janeiro: World's Biggest White PartyWhite parties can be weird, what happens if someone spills or blows chunks. But we imagine there'd be nothing to worry about when over two million people all hanging out on the beach with you are also wearing white and having rose petals from offerings to the "goddess of the waters" thrown all over them.Chances of finding true love: 4/10. Two million people in white is two million people stressed out about staining their shirts. RussefeiringGraduation parties can be fun but you inevitably: (1) get stuck in someone's parents’ basement, or (2) get stuck in a hotel room with people behaving as if it’s their first beer of all time, because it is. Norwegian teens have got us all beat. Every year, in this 300-year-old tradition, over 10,000 high school graduates descend on Oslo's Tryvann Park and proceed to binge drink, engage in some pretty public, uh, romantic spectacles, and a lot of disturbing of the peace.Chances of finding true love: -1/10. You might also go to jail, so…SongkranThough technically a celebration of the Thai New Year, Songkran could also pass for the world's biggest wet t-shirt contest. Taking place in mid-April, which can be the hottest, most humid time of year, partiers, mostly younger Thais, chill out by dumping buckets of water, spraying hoses, and super-soaking the shit out of each other in a gesture of "washing away" the year gone by.Chances of finding true love: 7/10. Wet t-shirt contests were and are the greatest boob-themed event in history.FastnachtsmontagLuckily you're not required to pronounce it to party. Just south of Zurich, the town of Zug is home to the peculiar female carnival figure of Greth Schell, who on the Monday before Mardi Gras parades through the streets of the city accompanied by seven fools in ludicrous costumes. As the legend goes, at midnight, she proceeds to carry her husband home in a basket after he has had too much to drink at the inn. Nowadays, the town mensfolk have taken this centuries’ old tale as the perfect excuse for them to get absolutely blotto and make their wives drive them home.Chances of finding true love: 10/10 if you are a human-sized basket maker.For more chaos visit Axe Canada's Facebook page!
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Icelandic law says "no dice" on fireworks for 364 days of the year so what do you expect happens the one day these pyro-prohibited folk can get their hands on them? And what day is it they get to singe that Bjorkian sky? New Year's Eve! Aside from projectile explosives, huge bonfires are set up in every quarter of the city and Icelanders frolic around the flames until midnight when the bars open. Then everyone lets loose in a hail of drinking, hookups, and really long unpronounceable last names.Chances of finding true love: 7/10. Something primal happens to our faces in firelight that make us want to take to caves and mate. Plus, fireworks make everyone look badass.Rio de Janeiro: World's Biggest White PartyWhite parties can be weird, what happens if someone spills or blows chunks. But we imagine there'd be nothing to worry about when over two million people all hanging out on the beach with you are also wearing white and having rose petals from offerings to the "goddess of the waters" thrown all over them.Chances of finding true love: 4/10. Two million people in white is two million people stressed out about staining their shirts. RussefeiringGraduation parties can be fun but you inevitably: (1) get stuck in someone's parents’ basement, or (2) get stuck in a hotel room with people behaving as if it’s their first beer of all time, because it is. Norwegian teens have got us all beat. Every year, in this 300-year-old tradition, over 10,000 high school graduates descend on Oslo's Tryvann Park and proceed to binge drink, engage in some pretty public, uh, romantic spectacles, and a lot of disturbing of the peace.
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