The Food Issue
Hate Cuisine
For all their fancy gigs at the Albert Hall, Mogwai also do a pretty good job at grassroots A&R-ing with their Rock Action label. A few years ago they had this great band from Liverpool called Kling Klang that sounded like Kraftwerk and Goblin.
Vice Mail
I’ve been saying for years that you assholes just sit around your house and pull your stories from the internet—thanks for getting careless and proving me fucking right.
Illegalize It!
Apples should be illegal. What a terrible food. They never satisfy your hunger and they make way too much noise. Have you ever heard someone bite into an apple? It’s disgusting. It sounds like a tree is falling inside someone’s skull.
Whose Farts Smell Worse?
We hired a male model from the internet and got two girls who work in porn to fart on his face twice. They did this once while wearing jeans and once while wearing skimpy porno underwear.
Fat Camp Mem'ries
When I was 14 I went to fat camp. It was completely voluntary. The only problem was that I wanted to go to Camp Shane, a famous fat camp in the Catskills that has a great reputation.
Grimewatch
When we’re not scouring message boards for mentions of Vice or posting MP3s on the RWD forum, we here at Grimewatch keep busy surfing Rupert Murdoch’s proverbial slut-fest, MySpace.
Instant Razor Blade Mash
Daniel Treacy has been missing in action for a while. Back in the 70s and 80s, his group The Television Personalities wrote classic, funny songs like “Part Time Punks” and “I Know Where Syd Barrett Lives.”
Eating Their Words
When you're the eight-foot tall singer in the Liars with a tendency towards manic on-stage behaviour, you tend to burn a lot of energy and get really hungry.
Whose Farts Smell Worse?
We hired a male model from the internet and got two girls who work in porn to fart on his face twice. They did this once while wearing jeans and once while wearing skimpy porno underwear.