Image via I knew Nelson Mandela's name almost as soon as I knew my own. Over the hum of Saturday morning cartoons, my South African mother told me Nelson Mandela was her hero. She explained that South Africa was her home, and that was where Mandela came from. As a child, I couldn't comprehend her stories about South Africa and Mandela's braveryâmy mother's home seemed like a mythâbut as I grew older, I began to understand her stories.Although as a white woman my mother was barred from visiting the townships where the government forced blacks to live, she broke the law to visit her friend Carmen. Eventually, she immigrated from South Africa to America, because she thought the country was on the verge of collapse.For years, my mother saw Mandela as a symbol of hope that brave people might one day fight Apartheid and end institutionalized racism. From America, she watched with awe when Mandela left prison and Apartheid ended. In the wake of Mandela's death, she has spoken to me several times about her past. This week, I sat down with my mother, Chryl Resnick, to talk about growing up in Apartheid-era South Africa, sneaking into townships, and why Mandela is her hero.VICE: What was it like to know that Apartheid existed while you were in South Africa?
Chryl Resnick: As soon as I was old enough to understand what was going on around meâwhich was pretty early on in my lifeâI knew that it was dead wrong. I couldnât understand why it existed. It always seemed wrong to me. I couldnât understand when I took Spanish dancing lessons with my friend Carmen, why I wasnât allowed to be friends with her. She wasnât allowed to come over to my house, because it was illegal. Black people couldnât come over to white peopleâs houses. I couldnât understand why I wasnât allowed to go to her house.Did you try to hang out with her when you could?
I think Carmen did come to my apartment a couple of times. The only time that non-white people could come into the white communities was to work in peopleâs homes or as domestic servantsâthey couldnât come on a social basis.What was it like to enter the townships to visit Carmen?
I remember one morning we went there the night after Carmen's brother had gotten the crap beaten out of him by the policeâthere had been a raid. I remember how uncomfortable I felt that he had to endure that at the hands of the white police.Was it uncomfortable because you felt guilty?
I felt like it was my fault. I'm white.Eventually, you discovered the police were following you, because you had visited a township. How did you find out?
A friend called my mother and told my mother that it might be better if we got out of the country, because the telephones were being tapped and we were being followed. I do recall one day walking on Sea Point Beach and feeling like I was being followed. I assumed I would have been arrested if I were caught. As a white person, it was illegal to go into townships.Was this around the same time that you became aware of Nelson Mandela?
I was always aware of Nelson Mandela. He's been my hero for a very long time. I always was negative about myself from the perspective that I wished I had the courage and the guts to stand by my convictionsâI was too afraid to end up in jail. I looked at Mandela and thought, My God, I wish I could be more like youâmore brave like you.What do you think you would have done if you didnât worry about imprisonment?
If had I stayed in South Africa, I would have become incredibly politically active. It always seemed wrong to me, and I couldnât understand it. I have to admit, I was never courageous enough to protest. I was always scared of what would have happened to me.Do you regret that you didn't stay and become politically active?
I regret having missed the most important events in South African history. When I left in 1976, a lot of people my age were leavingâmy generation left. We really left in droves.What do you think set you apart from people who accepted Apartheid?
I can only look inside my own family. I think my mother set me apart. My father was born and raised in South Africa, and thatâs all he knew. That was the system he was raised in, and thatâs what he knew. My mother never believed in Apartheid. Another part of it was that my brother never believed in Apartheid either.Did you ever get the chance to hear Mandela speak?
The only event that I went to where I saw him in person was in 1990 at the Los Angeles Coliseum after he was released from prison. It was one of the most amazing experiences of my life. I looked around the LA Coliseumâwhich I think holds 85,000 peopleâand it was packed to capacity. It was overflowing. All I could tell you is that when Nelson and his wife Winnie walked across the stage, tears streamed down my face. I never thought I would see that man alive.@GideonResnick
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Chryl Resnick: As soon as I was old enough to understand what was going on around meâwhich was pretty early on in my lifeâI knew that it was dead wrong. I couldnât understand why it existed. It always seemed wrong to me. I couldnât understand when I took Spanish dancing lessons with my friend Carmen, why I wasnât allowed to be friends with her. She wasnât allowed to come over to my house, because it was illegal. Black people couldnât come over to white peopleâs houses. I couldnât understand why I wasnât allowed to go to her house.Did you try to hang out with her when you could?
I think Carmen did come to my apartment a couple of times. The only time that non-white people could come into the white communities was to work in peopleâs homes or as domestic servantsâthey couldnât come on a social basis.
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I remember one morning we went there the night after Carmen's brother had gotten the crap beaten out of him by the policeâthere had been a raid. I remember how uncomfortable I felt that he had to endure that at the hands of the white police.Was it uncomfortable because you felt guilty?
I felt like it was my fault. I'm white.Eventually, you discovered the police were following you, because you had visited a township. How did you find out?
A friend called my mother and told my mother that it might be better if we got out of the country, because the telephones were being tapped and we were being followed. I do recall one day walking on Sea Point Beach and feeling like I was being followed. I assumed I would have been arrested if I were caught. As a white person, it was illegal to go into townships.Was this around the same time that you became aware of Nelson Mandela?
I was always aware of Nelson Mandela. He's been my hero for a very long time. I always was negative about myself from the perspective that I wished I had the courage and the guts to stand by my convictionsâI was too afraid to end up in jail. I looked at Mandela and thought, My God, I wish I could be more like youâmore brave like you.What do you think you would have done if you didnât worry about imprisonment?
If had I stayed in South Africa, I would have become incredibly politically active. It always seemed wrong to me, and I couldnât understand it. I have to admit, I was never courageous enough to protest. I was always scared of what would have happened to me.Do you regret that you didn't stay and become politically active?
I regret having missed the most important events in South African history. When I left in 1976, a lot of people my age were leavingâmy generation left. We really left in droves.What do you think set you apart from people who accepted Apartheid?
I can only look inside my own family. I think my mother set me apart. My father was born and raised in South Africa, and thatâs all he knew. That was the system he was raised in, and thatâs what he knew. My mother never believed in Apartheid. Another part of it was that my brother never believed in Apartheid either.Did you ever get the chance to hear Mandela speak?
The only event that I went to where I saw him in person was in 1990 at the Los Angeles Coliseum after he was released from prison. It was one of the most amazing experiences of my life. I looked around the LA Coliseumâwhich I think holds 85,000 peopleâand it was packed to capacity. It was overflowing. All I could tell you is that when Nelson and his wife Winnie walked across the stage, tears streamed down my face. I never thought I would see that man alive.@GideonResnick