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The VICE Guide to Right Now

A 52-Year-Old Finnish Man Ate €57,500 Worth of Cocaine, Then Shat it Out at Australian Customs

Where's the fucking blow baby?
Illustration Ashley Goodall

Earlier this week a 52 year old Finnish man rocked up to Brisbane International Airport and got busted for trying to smuggle 224 grams of cocaine over the border—inside his body.

In the secret world of airport smuggling, two methods seem to reign supreme: putting things up your butt, and putting things in your stomach. People who swallow things are usually called body packers: and that's the type we had here.


After Border Force officials questioned him, checked his bags, and worked out he wasn't here to see the sights, they cancelled his visa and passed him on the AFP. They worked out that he had drugs in his body, so they waited for him to, well, shit them out.

He ended up passing 26 pellets of cocaine—that's Border Force for little latex packets holding coke, heroin, or whatever else you're trying to slide over the border. If you're thinking these are just condoms stuffed with coke—don't. The workmanship of packets is pretty smooth these days, although there is still a risk they'll rupture.

That's the biggest health problem when smuggling drugs. If a pellet breaks, you could O.D pretty quick: and people have. This Finnish guy didn't die, but he's not in a great position right now.

If he'd sold the coke by the gram he probably would've made around $65,000 [€57,500 EUR]. Instead, he's got a court hearing today. He's been charged with one count of importing a marketable quantity of a controlled drug, and faces up to 25 years imprisonment.

Isabelle doesn't smuggle drugs but does have Twitter.